I stole a bunch of shit in my day. The one I'm probably the most proud of was the lock of hair I clipped off @Maureen when she was here.
WTF Thieving kids!! What did you steal!!!???
- Thread starter wetwillie
- Start date
Now that I think about it, it was probably her weave.
Amstel
The Hoarse Whisperer
this would be no big deal if you weren't comparing it to all the other locks of hair you clipped.
thintoast
Mayosapien
I bet this is his only lock that isn't made of pubic hair.this would be no big deal if you weren't comparing it to all the other locks of hair you clipped.
Dory Berkowitz-Bukowski
Clam whisperer
profits represent the theft of labor, so let's just say they're still ahead
Mean Mr. Mustard
Always shouts out something obscene
Publicly
Jehannum
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
Petunia
COVID POSITIVE FOREVER
First thing I recall stealing and getting caught was a pair of sunglasses when I was 13.
Miami-Dade brought me home in a cruiser and I cried like a little bitch all the way home.
Thievery wasn’t my thing to be honest.
What I did do, I think, was sometimes scam idiots who deserved it more than anything.
Like: thank you, that will be $200(10 dances)
Customer: I’m pretty sure that was 6 dances ($120)
Me: you can pay me or take it up with my bouncer.
Thanks boo
Miami-Dade brought me home in a cruiser and I cried like a little bitch all the way home.
Thievery wasn’t my thing to be honest.
What I did do, I think, was sometimes scam idiots who deserved it more than anything.
Like: thank you, that will be $200(10 dances)
Customer: I’m pretty sure that was 6 dances ($120)
Me: you can pay me or take it up with my bouncer.
Thanks boo
thintoast
Mayosapien
Dory Berkowitz-Bukowski
Clam whisperer
I used to steal bottles of rum or other spirits years ago from supermarkets. When I was super poor and down and out I'd go get almost a whole weeks worth of food for free from stores (prior to dumpsters!). I was never too bothered; it was a necessary evil.
Dory Berkowitz-Bukowski
Clam whisperer
My skilled cons continue to this day. When using self service checkouts I put chocolate croissants through as regular croissants sometimes. Take that capitalist pigs!
i was about 7-ish with Mom shopping and asked her to buy a cap gun for me.
“no,.. we’re here for groceries. put that back”
as i was about to replace the item an old man says, “hey kid, put it under your jacket and don’t tell anyone, ever”
i was hooked and began randomly taking shit like its’ mine already! my greatest thefts happened in plain sight because most people are like,
“wtf,.. did he just leave the store with a refrigerator?”
“no dummy, it’s probably just an exchange. who would be that stupid!”
psyop’s happen!
“no,.. we’re here for groceries. put that back”
as i was about to replace the item an old man says, “hey kid, put it under your jacket and don’t tell anyone, ever”
i was hooked and began randomly taking shit like its’ mine already! my greatest thefts happened in plain sight because most people are like,
“wtf,.. did he just leave the store with a refrigerator?” “no dummy, it’s probably just an exchange. who would be that stupid!”psyop’s happen!
Jehannum
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
I had trouble with my kids taking dumb sugary shit from the grocery line.i was about 7-ish with Mom shopping and asked her to buy a cap gun for me.
“no,.. we’re here for groceries. put that back”
as i was about to replace the item an old man says, “hey kid, put it under your jacket and don’t tell anyone, ever”
i was hooked and began randomly taking shit like its’ mine already! my greatest thefts happened in plain sight because most people are like,
psyop’s happen!
That shit ended real quick when we took the kids back and made them apologize to the store manager.