My neighbor is under Federal indictment!

[Valve1138]

My neighbor finally left. I wonder if he's meeting his lawyer to prepare for the arraignment.

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

that's a tough one. is the tree dead from homemade-ninja-star scars or beer piss?

I cant get close enough to tell.



edit - oh, and the dad is a mail man, for what thats worth.

 

[Thorn Bird]

I cant get close enough to tell.



edit - oh, and the dad is a mail man, for what thats worth.

well, can you not get close enough to tell because you're worried about ninja star scars or because you haven't had enough beer yet to pee?

 

[Jonny_B]

i had some neighbors renting across the street who were like that. put a big no trespassing sign on the chain-link fence around the yard and an overstuffed, stained sofa on the porch the day they moved in. had a couple pitbulls running around the front yard playing with their kids, always had a pile of garbage sitting on the curb (which the city doesn't pick up because it wasn't in the bin), drinking beer and fighting and all kinds of people coming and going at all hours. I still have no idea how many people lived there. They lasted about 3 months, I saw code compliance parked out front at least three different times. Not sure if they got evicted or what.

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

well, can you not get close enough to tell because you're worried about ninja star scars or because you haven't had enough beer yet to pee?

While ninja-star wounds could be a very real possibility, mostly its because I fear what may be lurking in the undergrowth of the "lawn"

 

[Thorn Bird]

hmm. it's probably a case of cross-breeding. i'm sorry, drool, but you have redbillies.

 

[Syrup Beaver]

hmm. it's probably a case of cross-breeding. i'm sorry, drool, but you have redbillies.

Redbillies? I thought those were Chinese farmers?

 

[Thorn Bird]

Redbillies? I thought those were Chinese farmers?

there's not a big threat of those in alabama. chinese means food down there.

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

godammit

 

[Valve1138]

Looks like the neighbor is home again today from work.

 

[b_sinning]

He had a busy day of shredding everything in sight.

 

[Dharma1521]

I come from this line. Literally related to the Hatfields of the Hatfields and McCoy's.

 

[Valve1138]

He had a busy day of shredding everything in sight.

Quite possibly.

Either that or he is taking a second mortgage out on his house to put up for bail money.

 

[Thorn Bird]

no reporters yet?

 

[Jonny_B]

have you prepared your "he always seemed like a normal guy, just kind of kept to himself" quote? (alternately: "he always creeped me out. birds stopped roosting in our trees when he moved in")

 

[Thorn Bird]

yeah, go the other way. like, "i spent so much time listening to him talk about ripping off everyone. i just thought he was kidding."

 

[Valve1138]

no reporters yet?

Nope I wanna be the crazy neighbor.

have you prepared your "he always seemed like a normal guy, just kind of kept to himself" quote? (alternately: "he always creeped me out. birds stopped roosting in our trees when he moved in")

Well I do know that he and his boyfriend both paid cash for their new cars.

yeah, go the other way. like, "i spent so much time listening to him talk about ripping off everyone. i just thought he was kidding."

"Muthafucka couldn't spare fifty cent for an egg sammich!"

 

[b_sinning]

An egg sammich sounds really good.

 

[Valve1138]

You guys missed it! A UPS truck showed up, could have seen it on the driveway cam!

 

[b_sinning]

Damn! Now my whole day is ruined.