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Puts the "pro" in procrastination
What do you call a Jedi with four eyes?
Jediiii
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
Whenever
@AppleTurkey is sad, I let her draw on my body.
I give her a shoulder to crayon.
Finally a new goddamn title
Just in case anyone misses 4/20 next week... don't worry, you can still get baked on 4/22.
Because it's 4/20 too.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
A factory that just makes OK products is the satisfactory.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
You should only put 239 or fewer beans in a soup, because just one more makes it too farty.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
The entire cast of Friends was lost at sea, but it all turned out alright because Lisa Kudrow.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
You shouldn’t call a Ring Wraith a “Nazgul”, because the N word is Wraithist.
Stuck with this Shitty Title
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
You know a drink is sick when it becomes cough-y.
Finally a new goddamn title
I went to the zoo earlier, and they only had one dog there.
It was a Shih Tzu.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
What kind of people never get angry?
Nomads
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
Spent my life savings on pasta.
Was worth every penne.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
I lost my dolphin.
I now have no porpoise in life.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
There are a lot of terrible jokes in this thread, but at the end of the day...
It's night.
Finally a new goddamn title
My dog ate a whole bunch of Scrabble tiles when I wasn't looking.
When he goes outside to poop, that could spell disaster.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
Saw a man's wig on sale for $1.
It was a small price toupée.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
What's a Jehovah's Witness' favorite band?
The Doors.
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
What did the farmer say when all his haystacks were stolen?
"That was the last straw".
Puts the "pro" in procrastination
Know what's worse than raining cats and dogs?
Hailing taxis.
Stuck with this Shitty Title