Bad Jokes

[Jehannum]

My buddy got hired as a quality inspector at the Canada Goose Jacket company. He doesn't like it very much though, lately he's feeling down.

 

[OOD]

Why was the chicken mad after he drank kool-aid?

Cause he got punched in the pecker

 

[Strings]

 

[Ex` ange]

What do you call a masturbating cow?

Beef stroganoff

 

[Jehannum]

What's the difference between Taxes and Texas?

Taxes can keep your electrical grid operating.

 

[Jehannum]

What do you call a masturbating cow?

Beef stroganoff

Bull.

 

[Strings]

What's the difference between Taxes and Texas?

Taxes can keep your electrical grid operating.

No really.

 

[Jehannum]

Instead of a swear jar, I have a negativity jar. Every time I have a pessimistic thought, I put a dollar in.

It's half empty.

 

[Domon]

What's the difference between Taxes and Texas?

Taxes can keep your electrical grid operating.

holy fuck.

seriously, that was great

 

[Jehannum]

holy fuck.

seriously, that was great

SHIT, I'm ruining my reputation.

 

[Ex` ange]

SHIT, I'm ruining my reputation.

nah. You have a backlog of uncool points you'll need to work through first.

 

[Jehannum]

Heard a joke about Oedipus and Midas, and it was motherfucking gold.

 

[Jehannum]

The doctor said I could have a stroke anytime, but now I'm banned from Target for wanking in the changing room.

 

[Jehannum]

For a while, Houdini used a trap door in all of his shows, but it was just a stage he was going through.

 

[Jehannum]

The mermaid wears sea-shells because she outgrew her B-shells.

 

[Jehannum]

Got a hammer stuck in my esophagus, and the doctors can't remove it.

They tell me it's the worst case of Thor-throat they've ever seen.

 

[Strings]

Good enough for a Thursday morning.

 

[Strings]

Ya know, J.
If you adopt a deadpan delivery, grow the beard another foot and wear just the speedo, you might be able to make a stage career out of these jokes.

 

[Jehannum]

When Mr. Miyagi is horny, he wax off.

 

[Jehannum]

I really like Switzerland. The flag is a big plus, too.