Hawt The Useless RPG Thread

Domon said:
You do.

The parties saddles up, after tending to its wounds, and eating a small meal, following the road toward the Tower of Arbaghast, in the west. It will be a long ride, through the night, but the party is eager to leave the bloodbath behind, and put the open road under their feet, leaving with their newfound wealth, and carried on the back of strong horses.

As they ride along, they see a figure, in ragged black and white, covered in vomit, weaving back along the dark road, weary and nearing exhaustion. She waves them down, and introduces herself as Sister Margaret.
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Slightly taken aback by the naked man in a codpiece and the drunk without pants I quickly regain my wits.
"Please can you help? I'm exhausted and in need of food. I've been walking two days with no nourishment and only water from the stream"
 
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Mrs. Valve said:
Hi, can we rewind to when I got the burglars pack along with studded leather, 10 vials, 2 healing potions, parchment, ink, quill and grappling hook kthx?
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You have them, paid in full... As we've seen what happens when you don't pay for your gear

Sent from my A0001 using Tapatalk
 
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kiwi said:
Slightly taken aback by the naked man in a codpiece and the drunk without pants I quickly regain my wits.
"Please can you help? I'm exhausted and in need of food. I've been walking two days with no nourishment and only water from the stream"
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Afram tosses a clean robe, a loaf of bread to go with the beast's cheese, and some soap to the stranger.

"Where are you headed, lady?" Afram asks, wondering if this stranger is going to bring more trouble on the troupe.
 
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Mr. Asa said:
Afram tosses a clean robe, a loaf of bread to go with the beast's cheese, and some soap to the stranger.

"Where are you headed, lady?" Afram asks, wondering if this stranger is going to bring more trouble on the troupe.
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Thank you kindly. I don't really know where I'm going. I thought I knew what I wanted to do with my life but have recently discovered there so much out there I have yet to experience.
 
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kiwi said:
Thank you kindly. I don't really know where I'm going. I thought I knew what I wanted to do with my life but have recently discovered there so much out there I have yet to experience.
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"Ahh" Afram said "Well we are engaged in a job already fraught with some danger. I don't believe we're traveling past any cities we could escort you to, and I do not think we will have the resources to fully protect you in the event of a fight. Do you have any skill in battle? In healing? If you travel with us you will have to hold your own in some way."
 
Domon said:
You also all just took on 6 equal strength mounted enemies, and two dogs, with only two fighting members for most the fight.

The dice rolled in your favor today.

For this, the birdman honors you each with a magic item of your choosing:

Ring of protection +1
Short sword +1
Lute of Sleep
A fine barrel of bourbon, which when drunk, imbues extraordinary stamina
A coin, which when flipped, always lands on heads
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Lute of sleep for me!
 
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Mr. Asa said:
"Ahh" Afram said "Well we are engaged in a job already fraught with some danger. I don't believe we're traveling past any cities we could escort you to, and I do not think we will have the resources to fully protect you in the event of a fight. Do you have any skill in battle? In healing? If you travel with us you will have to hold your own in some way."
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My father was a blacksmith and taught me when I was young. I can repair weapons and help care for the horses. I'm also a skilled rider and fantastic cook. Just the other day I made bacon wrapped lasagna for all the sisters and father. It was well received.
 
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kiwi said:
My father was a blacksmith and taught me when I was young. I can repair weapons and help care for the horses. I'm also a skilled rider and fantastic cook. Just the other day I made bacon wrapped lasagna for all the sisters and father. It was well received.
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"Well," Afram said, "I know what its like to need a change from your old manner of living. As far as I'm concerned you can come along with us if you've a mind to"
 
kiwi said:
My father was a blacksmith and taught me when I was young. I can repair weapons and help care for the horses. I'm also a skilled rider and fantastic cook. Just the other day I made bacon wrapped lasagna for all the sisters and father. It was well received.
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So...how is Jesus as a husband?
Would you like a shoulder rub? Glass of wine?
 
Side note: we need to think of a better way to manage when people are AFK. I can't think that there would be one universally used considering this is usually a game played in person
 
kiwi said:
My father was a blacksmith and taught me when I was young. I can repair weapons and help care for the horses. I'm also a skilled rider and fantastic cook. Just the other day I made bacon wrapped lasagna for all the sisters and father. It was well received.
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The birdman looks at you, cocking his head at a quizzical angle. He wonders if you have any enchanting or magical skills, as blacksmiths of the realm often do.
 
nukes said:
So...how is Jesus as a husband?
Would you like a shoulder rub? Glass of wine?
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"Is this man always this brazen? If so I'll make sure to travel on the opposite side of the party as him."
Domon said:
The birdman looks at you, cocking his head at a quizzical angle. He wonders if you have any enchanting or magical skills, as blacksmiths of the realm often do.
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Sure but someone else is gonna have the make them up cause I don't really pay attention when my family is playing so I have no idea.
 
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