The Fly Trap (Possibly NSFW)

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JAXvillain

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someone on genmay claimed to have written that paper and posted it a month or so ago

have you seen 2 girls, 1 finger yet? wow
 

BeerAd

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So my buddy who jumped the bridge wasnt found and they called off the search and rescue mission. It is soley a body recovery thing now so his funeral is on Saturday. I doubt I will actually attend though since I havent seen him in so long and I dont care to go to another one this year. I found out that he jumped from 74 feet up into just under 20 foot deep water and they had been drinking. Liquid courage is only good for picking up women, not high diving :(
 

Shalimar

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So my buddy who jumped the bridge wasnt found and they called off the search and rescue mission. It is soley a body recovery thing now so his funeral is on Saturday. I doubt I will actually attend though since I havent seen him in so long and I dont care to go to another one this year. I found out that he jumped from 74 feet up into just under 20 foot deep water and they had been drinking. Liquid courage is only good for picking up women, not high diving :(

my condolences.
 

ERage

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I hate how Dell makes me go through an hour of troubleshooting just to tell me what I already know.

Hi, this is Joe at Dell, what can I do for you today.

Hi, my optical drive has failed. It fails to read cd's and makes a nasty buzzing/clicking sound when it tries to spin up the disc.

OK, let's run through some basic troubleshooting. Reboot your computer and push f12, we are going to run some dell diagnostics.

I've already done that, it throws a read error code.

Let's try it one more time, just to see.

Fine, *goes through the same motions*

It threw the same error code.

OK, let's try updating the firmware.

Are you sure that will help, it's making a lot of bad noises. I think it's the read heads.

Let's try updating the firmware just to be sure.

OK, fine.

*Goes through motions*

Let's give it a try now, try to burn a cd for me.

OK, Roxio now says that it can't even recognize that there is a CD/RW drive in the PC.

OK, let's try to clear the upper and lower buffers in the registry.

Jesus Christ, fine.

*goes through motions*

Nope, it is still broken.

OK, it sounds to me like you have a failing read head in your drive. We are going to send you a new drive for your computer. Let's set up a time so onsite support can hook that up for you.

NO, I DO NOT WANT ONSITE SUPPORT. send it parcel only please.

OK, we'll do that




I mean, seriously, I know he could tell I wasn't an idiot in the first minute of the call. Why do those guys have to stick to the flow chart so strictly.

Oh well, at least it is at work so I get paid to waste time like this.
 

BeerAd

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Sorry BeerAd.

my condolences.

They found his body yesterday and they figured out he died on impact. His funeral is Tomorrow and it is nice to know they can bury him. Thanks for the kind words and sorry for bringing it up here but sometimes I just need to get it out. Since I dont go out anymore I rarely get time to talk to friends about important shit so I guess thats why I brought it up here. Thanks again guys
 

JAXvillain

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I hate how Dell makes me go through an hour of troubleshooting just to tell me what I already know.

Hi, this is Joe at Dell, what can I do for you today.

Hi, my optical drive has failed. It fails to read cd's and makes a nasty buzzing/clicking sound when it tries to spin up the disc.

OK, let's run through some basic troubleshooting. Reboot your computer and push f12, we are going to run some dell diagnostics.

I've already done that, it throws a read error code.

Let's try it one more time, just to see.

Fine, *goes through the same motions*

It threw the same error code.

OK, let's try updating the firmware.

Are you sure that will help, it's making a lot of bad noises. I think it's the read heads.

Let's try updating the firmware just to be sure.

OK, fine.

*Goes through motions*

Let's give it a try now, try to burn a cd for me.

OK, Roxio now says that it can't even recognize that there is a CD/RW drive in the PC.

OK, let's try to clear the upper and lower buffers in the registry.

Jesus Christ, fine.

*goes through motions*

Nope, it is still broken.

OK, it sounds to me like you have a failing read head in your drive. We are going to send you a new drive for your computer. Let's set up a time so onsite support can hook that up for you.

NO, I DO NOT WANT ONSITE SUPPORT. send it parcel only please.

OK, we'll do that




I mean, seriously, I know he could tell I wasn't an idiot in the first minute of the call. Why do those guys have to stick to the flow chart so strictly.

Oh well, at least it is at work so I get paid to waste time like this.

I find that verbally berating them into a fine puree expedites things
I kid...I just talk shop and they skip the nonsense usually

They found his body yesterday and they figured out he died on impact. His funeral is Tomorrow and it is nice to know they can bury him. Thanks for the kind words and sorry for bringing it up here but sometimes I just need to get it out. Since I dont go out anymore I rarely get time to talk to friends about important shit so I guess thats why I brought it up here. Thanks again guys

sorry to hear about that man <3
 

ERage

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I find that verbally berating them into a fine puree expedites things
I kid...I just talk shop and they skip the nonsense usually

Keyword there is "usually" this time that did not happen, but whatever. The guy was nice enough.

I find that Dell's gold support or higher tends to get you to a better grade tech who speaks English clearly. anything less than gold and you'll end up in Bombay with someone who either doesn't know what they are doing, or aren't able to articulate what to do.
 

JAXvillain

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Keyword there is "usually" this time that did not happen, but whatever. The guy was nice enough.

I find that Dell's gold support or higher tends to get you to a better grade tech who speaks English clearly. anything less than gold and you'll end up in Bombay with someone who either doesn't know what they are doing, or aren't able to articulate what to do.

I do all the crap myself but we have dell certified techs in house for the less adept...I need a part, I just tell them and provide the service tag
 

my little brony

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Keyword there is "usually" this time that did not happen, but whatever. The guy was nice enough.

I find that Dell's gold support or higher tends to get you to a better grade tech who speaks English clearly. anything less than gold and you'll end up in Bombay with someone who either doesn't know what they are doing, or aren't able to articulate what to do.

because back in the day computer companies and ISPs pretty much only hired young computer nerds to man the phones. once they realized they could hire some college dropout that couldn't quite make it as a cell phone salesman and pay him half as much they just printed out flow charts and told them not to deviate. they don't know a goddamn thing about computers.

Whenever I call comcast for my IP address they tell me a completely different one than the one I know I have.
 

SRC

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2girls.gif
 

Josh

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I saw a most excellent car accident today as I left the bank. There was a pickup truck in the left lane of a 4 lane road, turning left I assume into Papa John's parking lot. A Pontiac Grand AM rear ended the truck, and then it got rear ended by another car. The Pontiac had no wheels on the ground. It's ass end was on the hood of the car behind it and it was shoved way under the pickup. :lol: Man I wish I had a camera for that retardation.
 
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