StumbleUpon Thread of Jumble

April40 said:
What is my perfect crime? I break into Tiffany’s at midnight. Do I go for the vault? No. I go for the chandelier; it’s priceless. As I’m taking it down, a woman catches me. She tells me to stop. It’s her father’s business. She’s Tiffany. I say no. We make love all night. In the morning the cops come and I escape in one of their uniforms. I tell her to meet me in Mexico but I go to Canada. I don’t trust her. Besides, I love the cold. Thirty years later I get a postcard. I have a son. And he’s the Chief of Police. This is where the story gets interesting: I tell Tiffany to meet me in Paris by the Trocadero. She’s been waiting for me all these years. She’s never taken another lover. I don’t care. I don’t show up. I go to Berlin. That’s where I stashed the chandelier.
— Dwight Schrute (via capriquarius)
Click to expand...

:fly: reminds me i need to download last nights ep
 
zombiejesus1.gif
 
100 bucks for sex

Johnny wanted to have sex with a girl in his office...
but she belonged to someone else...


One day Johnny got so frustrated that he went up to her and said, "I'll
give you a $100 if you let me have sex with you..."
but the girl said, "NO."


Johnny said, "I'll be fast, I'll throw the money on the floor, you bend
down, and I'll be finished by the time you pick it up."


She thought for a moment and said that she would have to consult her
boyfriend...
so she called her boyfriend and told him the story.


Her boyfriend says ask him for $200 then pick up
the money very fast...
he won't even be able to get his pants down.


She agrees and accepts the proposal.


Half an hour goes by and the boyfriend is waiting for his girlfriend to
call. Finally after 45 minutes the boyfriend calls and asks what
happened...She said, "The bastard used quarters!"


Management Lesson: Always consider a business proposal in it's entirety
before agreeing to it, and getting screwed
 
Don't Buy Animals From Pet Shops!

Resist the temptation to buy that gorgeous kitten or puppy in the window. Because this lucrative pet shop market exists in Australia, backyard breeders and "puppy farms" who supply to pet shops continue to churn out more and more poor puppies and kittens, much to the detriment of the animals.

Approximately 130,000 dogs and 60,000 cats are killed at pounds every year. Unbelievable, eh?

The practice of selling animals from pet shops promotes impulse buying and irresponsible breeding for profit. Please help us to stop it. We already have far too many dogs and cats without homes.
 
[ame="http://www.dailymotion.com/tag/Cats/video/x7k9rx_tigers-leopards-vs-pumpkins_animals"]Dailymotion - TIGERS LEOPARDS vs Pumpkins! - a Animals video@@AMEPARAM@@http://www.dailymotion.com/swf/x7k9rx@@AMEPARAM@@x7k9rx[/ame]

Big cats playing with leftover pumpkins. Gosh they are just like HUGE house cats when it comes to playing.
 
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