Lettuce discuss annoying people in offices we work in.

[Dory Berkowitz-Bukowski]

I would've said "So can dihydrogen monoxide."

Yeah but you're all clever and shit.

 

[JAXvillain]

One of my highly intelligent work colleagues today informed me in a very condescending fashion that hypothermia can, in actual fact, kill you.

I feel enlightened.

What is the appropriate response to this? I raised my eyebrow, stared for about 3 seconds then looked back to my screen without saying a word.

you shout "AND SO CAN I" and mercilessly beat them about the head and neck with your keyboard

 

[b_sinning]

The scotcher that I'm stuck working with is hyper like a kid. He always has to be moving or making noise. Plus he has no attention span and isn't the sharpest tool in the shed.

 

[water]

I'd max out the character limit ranting about my co-workers.

 

[Dory Berkowitz-Bukowski]

There's a character limit?

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

Were facing layoffs this week, and if I manage to remain here, Im afeared of who else will remain.
Places like this are notorious for letting go the useful people while retaining the chuckle heads that can barely use a pencil.

 

[Dory Berkowitz-Bukowski]

For real? Is your job in jeopardy?

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

I hope so, Id love to punch alex trebek

 

[tre]

For real? Is your job in jeopardy?

he's Alex Trebek.

 

[tre]

I hope so, Id love to punch alex trebek

you just want to get your hands on a penis mightier

 

[DJBrenton]

Were facing layoffs this week, and if I manage to remain here, Im afeared of who else will remain.
Places like this are notorious for letting go the useful people while retaining the chuckle heads that can barely use a pencil.

You don't need to worry then. You're safe.

 

[Dory Berkowitz-Bukowski]

I hope so, Id love to punch alex trebek

What is the sound of one hand clapping?

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

Im very interested in jap anus relations

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

You don't need to worry then. You're safe.

Thanks!


edit - wait, fuck you!

 

[water]

There's a character limit?

I basically work with a real-life version of Homer Simpson, except dummer, fatter, balder, and married to a much less attractive woman.

 

[b_sinning]

The guy I was riding with today uses turn signals in the parking garage. I tried to explain to him that everyone knows you're turning right becuase you can't go in any other direction. After the vacant look I just decided to keep my thoughts to myself.

 

[plot]

outside of a few old hags and lack of scenery, my office is pretty laid back and cool.

there's only one guy that annoys the fuck out of me, and he annoys the fuck out of the entire office... don't even know his name or what he does, but he'll blow up the bathroom 2-3 times a day. i mean, he leaves a stench that makes you want to drown yourself. it's the kind of funk that sticks to your clothes and you can't get out of your nostrils for a good hour after you've been caught in the bathroom after him... it's the kind of stink that comes from 6 month old poop rotting between the dudes ass cheeks because he's to fat to wipe, i mean it simply isn't possible for him to clean around the anus area. whenever i see him come out of the bathroom when i gotta piss, i decide to take a trip to starbucks or the gas station instead. my boss fully understands.

pretty sure this fat fuck would foul out drool.

 

[Syrup Beaver]

Were facing layoffs this week, and if I manage to remain here, Im afeared of who else will remain.
Places like this are notorious for letting go the useful people while retaining the chuckle heads that can barely use a pencil.

Time to start using your pencils backwards!

 

[kiwi]

We had this one guy just up and start throwing a fit today. Full on sobbing and throwing a tantrum on the floor right in the middle of the office. Something about stricter conditions on playing games due to him not listening to the bosses, I don't know, it was a mess.

 

[Syrup Beaver]

Ooh, I have one of those employees as well.

Though mostly she's more of a boss.