KNYTE will solve your problems thread v.12/2008

[water]

Post your problems, I will either give you advice on how to solve them or solve them for you (I have a 9mm and a shovel, all doors are open to me).

 

[eileenbunny]

I want pics of your wife naked, but I cannot seem to convince her to send them to me. Please help.

 

[kiwi]

The dishes are not done and the kids are going to be hungry soon.

 

[my little brony]

I have bronchitis. Or pneumonia.

 

[eileenbunny]

My period is really heavy and I need to go to the mall. I'm afraid of leaking.

 

[APRIL]

99 problems and a bitch ain't one.

 

[zengirl]

I want to become independantly wealthy without killing or hurting anyone.

 

[my little brony]

99 problems and a bitch ain't one.

I guess I could say that because I don't have any bitch problems but I do have to worry about an epileptic pussy.

 

[theacoustician]

Do you want one of these for Christmas? http://gizmodo.com/5104917/

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

My cat farts. A lot.
But I dont want him dead.
What are my options?

 

[my little brony]

My cat farts. A lot.
But I do not want him dead.
What are my options?

now it's a haiku

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

now it's a haiku

wtf thats a weird accident


edit - o i c wat u did

 

[water]

-yawn-

Kill yourself.

Issue resolved.

I want pics of your wife naked, but I cannot seem to convince her to send them to me. Please help.

I have many. What can you offer in trade?

The dishes are not done and the kids are going to be hungry soon.

Rinse the dishes with hand soap and reuse them for lunch this one time. Then wash them properly.

I have bronchitis. Or pneumonia.

Wrap a warm towel around your head. It would have worked for Ferris Bueller had he actually been sick.

99 problems and a bitch ain't one.

wat

I want to become independantly wealthy without killing or hurting anyone.

Drug trade. They're only hurting themselves.

Do you want one of these for Christmas? http://gizmodo.com/5104917/

While cool it's probably really expensive to maintain. Also, I'm all about simplicity.

My cat farts. A lot.
But I dont want him dead.
What are my options?

My period is really heavy and I need to go to the mall. I'm afraid of leaking.

The fix to both of these: Wine cork.

 

[tre]

My driveway won't shovel itself. Halp?

 

[theacoustician]

Explain to me how mikey gets all the bitches.

 

[water]

My driveway won't shovel itself. Halp?

Mexican + shovel + $1.25 = Shoveled driveway

 

[water]

Explain to me how mikey gets all the bitches.

Simple Jack routine, women eat that crap up.

 

[tre]

There are no mexicans in Ottawa, help?

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

There are no mexicans in Ottawa, help?

I will send you some
How many do you want?
They come in packs of 12.

 

[tre]

I will send you some
How many do you want?
They come in packs of 12.

6 hot females for servicing
3 for cooking
3 for yardowrk

kthx