J
jaxxor
Guest
So I was driving to work this morning about 0630, when all of a sudden I felt a deep rumble in my gut. I needed to take a dump. Really, really, badly. You see, last night I was at a friend's house where I got drunk on Bud Light. Then when came home I ate about a quart of chili and beans since I had the munchies. I was now paying the price for it, and the bill was due right then.
I knew there was a Jack In The Box right off the highway next to the Woodlands Mall with a comfy bathroom and no need to ask for a key like at a convenience store, so pulled off I45 and headed in. Turns out I had less time than I thought, and no time for a backup plan. I frantically dove out of my car and quickstepped for the door. It was locked. Mother. Fucker. Turns out this JITB only has a 24 hour drive thru and isn't open for breakfast.
I was out of time. My one gambit had failed, and I had to make a decision. I looked around. Traffic was light, there was nobody watching me, so I ducked behind a dumpster, dropped trou, and took a shit. I could see the Mall through the trees across Woodlands Parkway with the sun coming up, and it wasn't a totally unpleasant experience.
I whipped out my trusty CRKT combat folding knife and cut my boxers away to wipe with, so I am now freeballing at work and giggling over the fact that some bum is mighty pissed that somebody took a shit in his living room.
I knew there was a Jack In The Box right off the highway next to the Woodlands Mall with a comfy bathroom and no need to ask for a key like at a convenience store, so pulled off I45 and headed in. Turns out I had less time than I thought, and no time for a backup plan. I frantically dove out of my car and quickstepped for the door. It was locked. Mother. Fucker. Turns out this JITB only has a 24 hour drive thru and isn't open for breakfast.
I was out of time. My one gambit had failed, and I had to make a decision. I looked around. Traffic was light, there was nobody watching me, so I ducked behind a dumpster, dropped trou, and took a shit. I could see the Mall through the trees across Woodlands Parkway with the sun coming up, and it wasn't a totally unpleasant experience.
I whipped out my trusty CRKT combat folding knife and cut my boxers away to wipe with, so I am now freeballing at work and giggling over the fact that some bum is mighty pissed that somebody took a shit in his living room.
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