In England at the moment we seem to have a problem with "identity" because the country is so multicultural nowadays so I thought I'd list a few things that I love nationally and locally about where I live.
1. I love Snooker, it's a brilliant sport, you can fall asleep for 2 hours and still feel part of the game. Plus there always seems to be one hot guy playing and his opponent is always fat and not too good looking, so you always know who you want to win.
2. I love cueing. I love the English way of cueing, we line up and waste loads of time because we're so inefficient and put on a show of acting pleasant and as if we're not annoyed. I particularly enjoy watching people get het up in cues, it makes me feel like I'm a better Brit simply because I'm calmer than them.
3. I love English scandals, where reporters from the BBC are exposed as snorting cocaine off hookers asses and we all act shocked but really wish we were them. And they get back on TV the next day anyway.
4. I love the truth in the assumption that no buses will turn up for ages, then 2 will come at once. It's amazing how often this happens and even if I'm late for something I smile to myeslf when I see 2 buses together.
5. Locally I love how Nottingham boasts loads of things, but we all know they're not true. We're famous for Robin Hood, yet I think we're 99% sure he wasn't from here. We boast the oldest pub, but I doubt it is, it's just nice to have something to tell tourists.
6. I love our local weatherman. He makes the weather worth watching. He's very middle class but just to liven up the whole weather thing he virtually body pops while showing you where the wind is coming from. He's really animated and it makes me smile.
That's the weather man.
Anyway, what's so good about where you are?
1. I love Snooker, it's a brilliant sport, you can fall asleep for 2 hours and still feel part of the game. Plus there always seems to be one hot guy playing and his opponent is always fat and not too good looking, so you always know who you want to win.
2. I love cueing. I love the English way of cueing, we line up and waste loads of time because we're so inefficient and put on a show of acting pleasant and as if we're not annoyed. I particularly enjoy watching people get het up in cues, it makes me feel like I'm a better Brit simply because I'm calmer than them.
3. I love English scandals, where reporters from the BBC are exposed as snorting cocaine off hookers asses and we all act shocked but really wish we were them. And they get back on TV the next day anyway.
4. I love the truth in the assumption that no buses will turn up for ages, then 2 will come at once. It's amazing how often this happens and even if I'm late for something I smile to myeslf when I see 2 buses together.
5. Locally I love how Nottingham boasts loads of things, but we all know they're not true. We're famous for Robin Hood, yet I think we're 99% sure he wasn't from here. We boast the oldest pub, but I doubt it is, it's just nice to have something to tell tourists.
6. I love our local weatherman. He makes the weather worth watching. He's very middle class but just to liven up the whole weather thing he virtually body pops while showing you where the wind is coming from. He's really animated and it makes me smile.
That's the weather man.
Anyway, what's so good about where you are?
