UF's Bone Closet : Featuring answers by elpmis

Millions said:
Dear Mr. Elf Lipmus,

Is there more to life then just being really really really, ridiculously good looking?
how about opening up a school that teaches children to read good?
 
ChikkenNoodul said:
So the B***** K*** I work at has run out of shake mix, since I just happen to have a prostate milking machine - I've been milking a bull out back and mixing it with vanilla flavoring and a touch of cow's milk. Do you think anyone will notice? And have I discovered a better tasting protein drink?
remember that simpsons episode where the school cafeteria is milking rats? well it took years for them to notice that, so my point is that you won't get caught, but also: SIMPSONS DID IT
 
ChikkenNoodul said:
Yup.

Double Whopper = I bring a friend
Double Whopper with cheese = I bring an uncut friend
Double Whopper with cheese and bacon = I bring an uncut friend who hasn't showered in a week
I'll have a the #3 combo and biggie size it
 
sizzlinggrace said:
how do you know a guy is into you and not just looking to get in your pants?


That's always the goal of any guy even if they disagree... the objective is to always get into your pants.


Or literally get in your pants cause he thinks they're cute, in fly's case. :fly:
 
sizzlinggrace said:
how do you know a guy is into you and not just looking to get in your pants?
I'll probably need more background info on the situation, but a good sign is that he wants to meet up with you (to hang out) during the day

if he keeps pushing for night dates ... you get it