The Fly Trap (Possibly NSFW)

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There was a kitty clawing the couch in my bedroom last night and Ryan decided to jump out of the bed onto the floor in such a way as the big *BOOM* of his landing would scare the kitty away from the couch.

Well, he failed to realize how slippery our carpet was and instead of landing on his feet, they slipped out from under him and now he has a dinner plate sized cherry burn on his butt cheek.


He should have learned the lesson from me because I actually fell down the stairs the night before and have a 6" long bruise going down the side of my forearm from where my arm tried to stop me from sock skiing down the steps.

:fly:

Homeownership is dangerous
 
He should have learned the lesson from me because I actually fell down the stairs the night before and have a 6" long bruise going down the side of my forearm from where my arm tried to stop me from sock skiing down the steps.

:fly:

Homeownership is dangerous

last time I did that I redislocated my shoulder and instead of dealing with the emergency room I popped it back in place myself all mel gibson like :cool:
 
last time I did that I redislocated my shoulder and instead of dealing with the emergency room I popped it back in place myself all mel gibson like :cool:

I have a deep tissue bruise, so the only bruising is a purple line outlining the part that is all swollen and hurts really bad but isn't really discolored other than being pink.

I either bruised the bone or my arms are too fat for the bruise to show through.
 
and then baloney started tearing into her and i was like giddy while reading that thread. it was fuckin hilarious
 
He can be a real meanie head when he wants to be.

edit: don't kid yourself though, he'd still stick his peepee in her
 
He can be a real meanie head when he wants to be.

edit: don't kid yourself though, he'd still stick his peepee in her

His standards obviously dip pretty low, he sexed you. I had no doubt he would fellate her but the thread was still pretty funny.
 
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