So, tell me about going to a wake...

Wakes are for laughing and celebration of the person's life. The more you laugh and carry on, the better you are doing.
 
fly said:
I have never been to one. Is there anything expected of me? Anything I shoudl say or do? I'm totally clueless.
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i'll tel you what not to do..


don't hit on the widow or masterbate to her hot daughters while yer giving a eulagy.


they dont' like it.
 
you can try to laugh, and you might a bit, but my experience has been that they are very tough. you've got a mother there who's lost her child. you've got children there who've lost their father, or a wife who's lost her husband, or grandparents that outlived their grandkid. it's not a time that you'll enjoy if it's hard for you to watch others grieve.
but it's very powerful, and it's amazing how much closure and comfort you can find in one if you let yourself just be. if you use it for what it is, you can gain a lot from it. it's very intimate.

this is all MHO and my experiences, anyway.
 
I hate wakes. I'd rather take a trip to the gyno than go to one. Just look as depressed as possible and you'll fit right in. Course if you aren't depressed before you arrive don't worry, you will be within 5 minutes of being there. Then you can stand around and watch everyone talk about how much of a shame it is they passed on, how much they will be missed (tho many won't actually miss them) and all the good memories they had of that person (as if it were like their 5 mins of fame with the deceased) while they ball their eyes out over someone they probably never really ever knew.
 
Pandora said:
I hate wakes. I'd rather take a trip to the gyno than go to one. Just look as depressed as possible and you'll fit right in. Course if you aren't depressed before you arrive don't worry, you will be within 5 minutes of being there. Then you can stand around and watch everyone talk about how much of a shame it is they passed on, how much they will be missed (tho many won't actually miss them) and all the good memories they had of that person (as if it were like their 5 mins of fame with the deceased) while they ball their eyes out over someone they probably never really ever knew.
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you need a hug
 
It seems my friend died of an intentional drug overdose. (I'm not so certain about the intentional part.)

Jason A. Cowan

COWAN, Jason A., 27, of Tampa, passed away Thursday, November 3, 2005. He was preceded in death by his father, Larry Cowan. Survivors include his mother, Doris Cowan; three sisters, Pamela Bell, Richelle Colley and Robin Finicle; one brother, Michael Colley, and wife, Michelle; and his maternal grandmother, Reba Showers-DeJonge. The family will receive friends 6-8 p.m. Monday, November 7, 2005, at the Stowers Brandon Chapel. In lieu of flowers, those who wish may make contributions to the American Cancer Society. STOWERS-BRANDON Published in the TBO.com on 11/6/2005.
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I treat wake's just like funeral's, but I'm not in to that whole "celebrate" their life thing, even though I can indetify it as a good idea, it doesn't make me feel any better. I need to be sad for awhile to get over a friend's death, for me it just takes time. At every funeral I've been to I think that the situation would be a lot better if I believe that my friend was now in what the bible refers to as 'heaven'. It's that brief sense of concept that makes me realize why so many people believe in God. Seems like a heavy burden to say "they're gone, for good" and know that I'll be that way one day as well.
 
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