Should I be a consumer whore today?

S

smileynev

Guest
Is the first one a gun or something?

I vote for 3 because I'm fat.
 
S

smileynev

Guest
wrong time of day to ask that on useless. Hardly anybody posts right now.
 

DirkPhoenix

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BigNev said:
wheres the after sex story you said you were gonna post?
Ah yes...

My latest post-sex ritual:

A horribly melodramatic fight as to why I haven't asked her to marry her yet, citing that the past two weeks have been so amazing and she hasn't brought up once that my mother is the bitch-queen of Texas and that I really don't need to save up money to buy her the $6000 ring she wants because they offer financing and it's about time I stopped wanting to save my money and start spending it, and how my buying or making her dinner every night is just something I'm supposed to do because she drives over to my place to spend the night, even though the reason she does this is because apparently I take too long to get over to her place so this way she can see me sooner, and by "see me sooner" she means "make her dinner sooner because she doesn't like to make dinner and she's spending all of her money on Coach accessories" but that hardly matters now because the real reason I haven't asked her to marry me is beyond my non-answer of "I'm not ready" because what I apparently mean is that since she is nice to me right now I have no incentive to marry her and just in case you think you misread that i'll bold the important parts by repeating that since she is nice to me right now I have no incentive to marry her, which is her way of saying that the reason she is being nice to me is so that I will marry her and just to be sure that I understood that she says that because of the way she treats me she is entitled to a ring, which is interesting to me because as we fight long into the AM hours the night before my birthday I am caught dumbfounded as to how someone can claim that she likes to treat me good but then says, as she wears through the hangover caused by the margaritas I made her, that the reason she treats me good is so I will marry her so I am left laying on 1/4 of my bed as the rest is taken up by her and her fucking dog thinking of how a jacketed hollow point would taste and wondering why I haven't told this person to pack up her shit and get the hell out of my apartment but then I remember that the reason I don't do this is because I am an idiot and it gives me good fodder to tell the world so take my words as a warning to you all that a girl who treats you good is just doing so to get you married to her and as a cool post I once saw reads: "A girl is like a prize fighter: no action until the ring."
 

theacoustician

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Sep 30, 2004
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DirkPhoenix said:
Ah yes...

My latest post-sex ritual:

A horribly melodramatic fight as to why I haven't asked her to marry her yet, citing that the past two weeks have been so amazing and she hasn't brought up once that my mother is the bitch-queen of Texas and that I really don't need to save up money to buy her the $6000 ring she wants because they offer financing and it's about time I stopped wanting to save my money and start spending it, and how my buying or making her dinner every night is just something I'm supposed to do because she drives over to my place to spend the night, even though the reason she does this is because apparently I take too long to get over to her place so this way she can see me sooner, and by "see me sooner" she means "make her dinner sooner because she doesn't like to make dinner and she's spending all of her money on Coach accessories" but that hardly matters now because the real reason I haven't asked her to marry me is beyond my non-answer of "I'm not ready" because what I apparently mean is that since she is nice to me right now I have no incentive to marry her and just in case you think you misread that i'll bold the important parts by repeating that since she is nice to me right now I have no incentive to marry her, which is her way of saying that the reason she is being nice to me is so that I will marry her and just to be sure that I understood that she says that because of the way she treats me she is entitled to a ring, which is interesting to me because as we fight long into the AM hours the night before my birthday I am caught dumbfounded as to how someone can claim that she likes to treat me good but then says, as she wears through the hangover caused by the margaritas I made her, that the reason she treats me good is so I will marry her so I am left laying on 1/4 of my bed as the rest is taken up by her and her fucking dog thinking of how a jacketed hollow point would taste and wondering why I haven't told this person to pack up her shit and get the hell out of my apartment but then I remember that the reason I don't do this is because I am an idiot and it gives me good fodder to tell the world so take my words as a warning to you all that a girl who treats you good is just doing so to get you married to her and as a cool post I once saw reads: "A girl is like a prize fighter: no action until the ring."
1. Longest. Sentence. EVAR!
2. Tell her no ring until anal. That'll shut her up fast.
3. Even if she follows through with #2, dump her anyways and move to another state.