Rat update...pictures to accomapny soon

S

shawndavid

Are you wanting making fuck berserker?
Jun 14, 2005
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In either a book or a Word doc on my couch in St.
Marklar
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*PICS* Rat update...pictures to accompany soon

I brought him to work with me. We have a retention pond out back and plenty of wilderness for him to dig his little toes into.

So...I released him about 10 yards from the water's edge and he bounded happily into the drink. He swam out about ten feet and went under, seemingly just disappearing. One of my coworkers mentioned that the alligator was zero-ing...zeroeing...(how the fuck...ergh) in on him from across the way. He then resurfaced about ten feet from where he had gone under, still swimming like a, uh, rat who was pretty tired. Next he decided to turn into the current - yes, if you're a rat, the breeze I would imagine makes a current even in a retention pond - and swam 'up-pond'. After a bit of struggling he turned back away from us and aimed to the other side to which he was now getting close. Unfortunately, the alligator was waiting patiently near the bank with his eyes trained on little Bubbles.

Well, Bubbles finally made it to the shore, passed the waiting gator, and hopped up to higher ground - safety!

NOT

A friggin' egret came down, picked him up in the air, and appeared to partially impale him, then dropped him from about 50 feet to his death. The damned bird didn't even have the decency to eat him. It was like a damned South Park episode where Kenny escapes death like a gazillion times and then eats shit anyway.

I tried, people.

I'll have pics of him cage-bound and traversing the mighty river as soon as I get them uploaded.
 
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somewhere, in the background of his post, i can hear the whip cracking.....
 
Is that true? I want to live near ponds with alligators and egrets. All we have is mosquitoes and seagulls.
 
Well I think it's safe to say it was that fucker's time. It's a good thing the egret didn't fail, because the flaming meteor would've scared the shit out of you.
 
Lame-o said:
Well I think it's safe to say it was that fucker's time. It's a good thing the egret didn't fail, because the flaming piece of foam from the space shuttle would've scared the shit out of you.
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phicst
 
Lame-o said:
Well I think it's safe to say it was that fucker's time. It's a good thing the egret didn't fail, because the flaming meteor would've scared the shit out of you.
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I just fell out laughing in class. thx
 
A question: Would it have been more humane to have just axed the little fucker yourself? I mean he ended suffering anyway, near as I can tell. First, a near drowning, a close escape from a reptilian carnivore, getting impaled and then lastly getting dropped from 50ft in the air to his death. Sounds pretty horrifying to me.

Bonus question: How many mouse feet is 50 human feet anyway? Did he feel like it was only a fifty foot drop, or was it more like a 500 foot or 5,000 foot drop to the mouse?
 
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lemon_fresh said:
A question: Would it have been more humane to have just axed the little fucker yourself? I mean he ended suffering anyway, near as I can tell. First, a near drowning, a close escape from a reptilian carnivore and then lastly getting dropped from 50ft in the air to his death. Sounds pretty horrifying to me.

Bonus question: How many mouse feet is 50 human feet anyway? Did he feel like it was only a fifty foot drop, or was it more like a 500 foot or 5,000 foot drop to the mouse?
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Don't forget that he was shishkabobed too :fly:
 
lemon_fresh said:
A question: Would it have been more humane to have just axed the little fucker yourself? I mean he ended suffering anyway, near as I can tell. First, a near drowning, a close escape from a reptilian carnivore and then lastly getting dropped from 50ft in the air to his death. Sounds pretty horrifying to me.

Bonus question: How many mouse feet is 50 human feet anyway? Did he feel like it was only a fifty foot drop, or was it more like a 500 foot or 5,000 foot drop to the mouse?
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I doubt it was a near drowning, rats are actually very good swimmers. This outcome also provided a much better story to share with the rest of us.
 
Pics will wait til at least tonight...Malibu-Fab Amy accidentally put my camera in her purse and brought it to work with her sans USB cable.


kiwi said:
I doubt it was a near drowning, rats are actually very good swimmers.
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I don't know what his deal was, he must have been exhausted from shitting and pissing all over our garage floor.
 
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