Hawt Pooping rituals

aw jeez, the whole point of dropping it in the water is so it absorbs the aroma


I do my best angry bird playing when taking the browns to the super bowl

if I'm in a porta pooper though I prefer to join the ranks of the shithouse poets

Here I sit, cheeks a flex'n
Giving birth to another Texan
 
have we verified they simply don't sit the opposite way of us?

One of my ex's lived in Holland for 5yrs. He reckoned it was good because you could tell if your intestines were fucked up cos you'd have to see if it was green or blue or whatever.

Also the Dutch are so tall they can probably barely see their poop when they stand up, must be like 9foot away from em.
 
I normally just poop. Unless I need a break from the kids, then I'll make up reasons to be in there for 10-15 minutes. Normally, it ends up with me just yelling at them that I"m going to the bathroom the whole time though and to leave me alone for a few minutes until I get frustrated with yelling and leave the bathroom.

You should get a husband that pulls his weight.
 
Surprisingly, you don't wind up leaving a lot of smear. The power with which those toilets flush and run water over the shelf is damned impressive. That was my biggest fear when I first saw the thing but after my first poop I wasn't worried anymore. It was the smell that you had to worry about. Dizzying.