WTF Please tell me this is from The Onion: Hugging banned

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dbzeag

Wants to kiss you where it stinks
Jun 9, 2006
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http://www.oregonlive.com/portland/index.ssf/2010/03/out-of-control_hugging_leads_t.html

The hugs were out of control at West Sylvan Middle School.

Students could not pass each other in the hallway without a hug, the principal said. The girls were hugging one another all the time. Kids were late to class because of the hugs.

Classes would end, middle schoolers would eye a classmate at the other end of the hallway, "they'd scream, run down the hallway and jump in each other's arms," Principal Allison Couch said.

It was, Couch said, a virus of hugs.

So the principal banned hugs on the school campus in late February.
 
Hugs lead to sex which leads to STDs unwanted pregnancies, absent fathers, prostitution and adultery. Which are not good thngs. If all the girls wore burqas this wouldn't be a problem.
 
How does this work exactly? I mean don't kids learn by example? Don't they get hugged at home? Maybe they don't and are turning to their friends for much-needed physical contact.

I find it interesting as I was growing up we were ENCOURAGED to hug each other. Maybe this principal was part of that generation that was pissed off about having to hug and is taking it out on the kids today?

What scares me are the comments, most of which support this decision.
 
From the comments:

Studies have shown that hugging among adolescents should only occur during Christian summer camp experiences after accepting the Lord Jesus into one's heart while sitting around a campfire late at night after a day of frolicking on the beach, sucking in fresh mountain air, tasting ripe berries and feeling the glow of the Lord God Almighty. If the suntanned college-aged camp counselor (the one with the guitar) tries to hug you, make sure you are ready and that you only choose to do so in the name of the Lord.

Studies have also demonstrated that slow dancing to the song "Beth" by KISS often results in erections among males.

:lol:
 
Hugging was important for me in 8th grade especially.
This guy, Joe LeFevre used to stick his hand up my shirt and grab my boob. I thought that was cool.

So, hugging is important to kids and it shouldn't be bant.
 
If you're late to class due to excessive hugging, then yes something needs to be done. Kids are retards. You have to hit them over the head with bricks sometimes.
 
Hugs lead to sex
sex leads to anger
anger leads to hate
hate leads to suffering

thus
hugging = cruise control to the dark side of the force.
 
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