I was so excited the day I brought Tuscan Whole Milk home to my family. All was well the first week or so, but suddenly one day I can home from work to find that Tuscan Whole Milk had went bad.
I found that my dog was missing and there were pieces of hair all over the house. As I walked around the house trying to piece together exactly what was going on my daughter came down the stair, crying, to inform me that she was pregnant, inseminated with the opaque contents contained inside Tuscan Whole Milk's thin plastic shell. Horrified I searched the house looking for my wife, contemplating what terrible fate may have come to her. As I searched the house I found a note on the mantle. Was it a ransom note or something worse I asked myself. As I read the words of the note contained inside I began to weep openly. My wife had left me and ran away with Tuscan Whole Milk.
I still have nightmares to this day when I think about the day Tuscan Whole Milk went bad. If you are to ever come across Tuscan Whole Milk I would advise you to stay away, even though it may look delicious it is spoiled, rotten to the very last drop.
