Halp Oil changes, when and where

It costs what, like $20-30 to get an oil change most places? Sooo not worth it to change my own in the cars at that price, I suppose if I had a rare vehicle I'd do it myself.

Bikes are a different story, the shops want $70 or so to do it :wtf:

Actually dealers are now charging up to $45. Even so.

You go to the dealership and an hour later your oil is changed.


OR

You jack up your car and unscrew the oil plug. (5 minutes) Have a beer while you wait for it to drain.
Remove oil filter and replace oil filter. Screw in new oil plug. Have another beer.
Pour new oil in. Have another beer.

30 minutes later, you are at home instead of having to drive to the dealership, and you got to drink beer.
 
I think she's referring to the fact that being completely underneath a car to do the work without it being on something holding the entire thing up is the scary part. I used to have an isuzu trooper. Had so much clearance underneath it, I could slide under and do everything without even jacking it up. The lack of clearance on my Mustang is bothersome in the fact that any accident with the jack is guaranteed pancake.

4 jack stands instead of 2? Not sure how it's any scarier than changing your oil. Or maybe I just haven't heard enough stories to be scared about it.
 
Actually dealers are now charging up to $45. Even so.

You go to the dealership and an hour later your oil is changed.


OR

You jack up your car and unscrew the oil plug. (5 minutes) Have a beer while you wait for it to drain.
Remove oil filter and replace oil filter. Screw in new oil plug. Have another beer.
Pour new oil in. Have another beer.

30 minutes later, you are at home instead of having to drive to the dealership, and you got to drink beer.
I don't go to dealers for oil changes, and it takes 10 minutes at pretty much every place I go to.

I have enough problems carting the used oil from my bikes places, I don't need to worry about it for the cars as well.
 
if you have a low clearance vehicle you can get a pair of ryno ramps just about anywhere now. Think even walmart has them. That's what I used when I drove a car and changed my own oil.

don't have to deal with jacks or jack stands then.
 
Oil Change Instructions for Women:
1) Pull up to Jiffy Lube when the mileage reaches 3000 miles
since the last oil change.
2) Drink a cup of coffee.
3) 15 minutes later write a check and leave with a properly
maintained vehicle. Money spent:
Oil Change $20.00
Coffee $ 1.00
Total $21.00

Oil Change Instructions for Men:
1) Go to auto parts store and write a check for $50.00 for
oil, filter, kitty litter, hand cleaner and a scented tree.
2) Discover that the used oil container is full. Instead of
taking it back to O'Reilly to recycle, dump in hole in back yard.
3) Open a beer and drink it.
4) Jack car up. Spend 30 minutes looking for jack stands.
5) Find jack stands under kid's pedal car.
6) In frustration, open another beer and drink it.
7) Place drain pan under engine.
8) Look for 9/16 box end wrench.
9) Give up and use crescent wrench.
10) Unscrew drain plug.
11) Drop drain plug in pan of hot oil: get hot oil
on you in process.
12) Clean up mess.
13) Have another beer while watching oil drain.
14) Look for oil filter wrench.
15) Give up; poke oil filter with screwdriver and twist off.
16) Beer.
17) Buddy shows up; finish case of beer with him.
Finish oil change tomorrow.
18) Next day, drag pan full of old oil out from underneath car.
19) Throw kitty litter on oil spilled during step 18.
20) Beer. No, drank it all yesterday.
21) Walk to 7-11; buy beer.
22) Install new oil filter making sure to apply a thin
coat of oil to gasket surface.
23) Dump first quart of fresh oil into engine.
24) Remember drain plug from step 11.
25) Hurry to find drain plug in drain pan.
26) Discover that the used oil is buried in a hole in
the back yard, along with drain plug.
27) Drink beer.
28) Uncover hole and sift for drain plug.
29) Discover that first quart of fresh oil is now on the floor.
30) Drink beer.
31) Slip with wrench tightening drain plug and bang
knuckles on frame.
32) Bang head on floorboards in reaction to step 31.
33) Begin cussing fit.
34) Throw wrench.
35) Cuss for additional 10 minutes because wrench hit
Miss December (1992) in the left boob.
36) Beer.
37) Clean up hands and forehead and bandage as
required to stop blood flow.
38) Beer.
39) Beer.
40) Dump in five fresh quarts of oil.
41) Beer.
42) Lower car from jack stands.
43) Accidentally crush one of the jack stands.
44) Move car back to apply more kitty litter to
fresh oil spilled during step 23.
45) Beer.
46) Test drive car.
47) Get pulled over: arrested for driving under the influence.
48) Car gets impounded.
49) Make bail.
50) Get car from impound yard.
Money spent:
Parts $50.00
DUI $2500.00
Impound fee $75.00
Bail $1500.00
Beer $25.00
Total-- $4150.00
But you know the job was done right.