Merry Christmas, Nerd Style

elpmis said:
Okay, check this out

I'm gonna buy a ton of those wal-mart santas and dress them up in elaborate dress attire, basically what you would wear to church, you know complete with hats and scarves and what not. Then I'll take them down to my local town hall and scatter them out all over the front lawn, standing of course. And they'll all be programmed to nod their heads and just say "mhm" over and over again, just nodding and saying "mhm". Then I'll have one santa in a suit standing on top step of the town all, dressed in a suit, facing the other santas, and he'll be talking about how he wants more cookies and milk for his fellow santas, or he'll stop working on christmas all together - it'll be called "the million santa march"
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Oh shit!

I just read that the hack only has a 240 second audio limit. I wonder if that can be extended?
 
theacoustician said:
Oh shit!

I just read that the hack only has a 240 second audio limit. I wonder if that can be extended?
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it better

'cause Santa Claus has a lot to say my brother!
 
theacoustician said:
Oh shit!

I just read that the hack only has a 240 second audio limit. I wonder if that can be extended?
Click to expand...

You could probably cascade multiple chips and just have them trigger off in succession. Then say that the Santa at the podium was taking a brief pause to gather his thoughts.
 
okay, I just finished writing the new words to "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" that I will be recording on my hacked santa

You better not shout
You better not cry
I'll be fucking your ass till the 4th of July
Santa Claus is coming to Town

I'll be making a list
And checking it twice
I've fucked so many kids
I've got pokemon for public lice
Santa Clause is coming to Town

I see you when your sleeping
I know when your awake
I know if you've been bad or good
Grab my Santa dick and give it a shake

OOOOOoooooooooooooooo

You better not shout
You better not cry
I'll be fucking your ass till the 4th of July
Santa Claus is coming to Town
 
elpmis said:
okay, I just finished writing the new words to "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" that I will be recording on my hacked santa

You better not shout
You better not cry
I'll be fucking your ass till the 4th of July
Santa Claus is coming to Town

I'll be making a list
And checking it twice
I see you when your sleeping
I know when your awake
I know if you've been bad or goodI've fucked so many kids
I've got pokemon for pubic lice
Santa Claus is coming to Town


Grab my Santa dick and give it a shake

OOOOOoooooooooooooooo

You better not shout
You better not cry
I'll be fucking your ass till the 4th of July
Santa Claus is coming to Town
Click to expand...

I don't think I've read something so offensive in my entire life, ever. :fly:
 
KNYTE said:
I don't think I've read something so offensive in my entire life, ever. :fly:
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read it again man, when I first pasted it it got all fucked up

I think my conscience was trying to tell me something
 
"I arrive at the art gallery and check out the remaing artworks. Most of them seem sexual in nature. You know. George Bush with an erection, that sort of thing."


:lol:
 
Damn I want a couple of these things to play with. Looks like you could technically hook them up to a PC with multichannel output to drive the audio all at once. That way you could have then timed properly. Then you could probably use somethink like a midi controller to tap the analog motor controls.

Ah the possibilities...
 
ofuck, if you could set this thing up as a pseudo-keroke machine, you could put him on your front lawn, peek out your living room window with a microphone in hand and shout obscenities at the people walking past your house!
 
And if you want the words to the most offensive Christmas song ever, here you go:

South Park: Chef Aid, Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics Soundtrack Lyrics
Artist: Kenny McCormick & Mr. Hankey Lyrics
Song: The Most Offensive Song Ever Lyrics
Mr. Hankey: Howdy Ho!
The Virgin Mary was sleeping when Angel Gabriel appeared,
He said, "You are to be the virgin mother"
And Mary thought that was weird.

Kenny: So he sat (Mmmmmppppppppph)
(Mmmmmppppppppph)

Mr. Hankey: But then Gabriel said to Mary,
"My child, have no fear."

Kenny: For you can suck all the dick you want...

Together: And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Mr. Hankey: And still not be considered flawed.

Kenny: I know you'd like to play,

And suck right through the night,

Together: You're still a virgin in the eyes of God.

Mr. Hankey: There was no room at the inn
When Mary and Joseph did arrive
They were so very tired you see

Kenny: (Mmmmmppppppppph)

Mr. Hankey: She said she had no money

Kenny: And she needed a place to sleep

Mr. Hankey: Gabriel appeared to Mary and told her not to weep

Kenny: Because, you can suck all the dick you want...
And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Mr. Hankey: And still be the mother of Christ.

Together: If there's no room at the inn
Its not considered a sin

Kenny: So suck my dick and get away from me.

[Laughs]

Mr. Hankey: That's right!
And three wise men did appear
Bearing gifts of myrrh and such
They said that they had followed a star
And missed a woman's touch

Kenny: (Mmmmmppppppppph)

Mr. Hankey: But again Gabriel appeared to her and this is what he said

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Together: And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Mr. Hankey: Every one in the nation.

Kenny: Fellatio ain't no sin
So have a dildo three miles in

Mr. Hankey: And you'll still be a virgin

Kenny: To everyone gone down on Christmas.

Kenny: You can suck all the dick you want...

Together: And still be a virgin, Mary!

Kenny: You can take it from the ox and the lamb...

Mr. Hankey: And even the little drummer boy.
Folks will remember your name quick.

Kenny: For sucking the biggest dick.

Together: Because sucking dick bring peace on Earth and joy!

Kenny: Because sucking dick...

Mr. Hankey: ..bring peace on Earth and joy!

Kenny: You can suck my dick!

[Laughter]
 
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