Making Amends

b_sinning

Erect Member
Nov 22, 2004
22,790
47
41
47
Savannah, GA
Marklar
₥10
I've always hated having to say I'm sorry. Especially when I thought I was right. But as I get old I've realized it's something you just have to do. Over the years I've had several friends and girlfriends that I haven't parted on good terms with. It was always that we were good friends until life and some stupid argument got in the way and we parted on bad terms because both sides thought they were right. A few of these friends I've missed and I started thinking who cares about who is right or wrong in a stupid argument. I'd rather have my friend back than be alone only being able to rationalize it to myself that I was right. So as a side project I've been making amends.

Everyone one of the people I've hunted down and said I was sorry to was happy as hell to hear from me. Some were surprised to admit that to themselves. They have admitted they wouldn't have done it themselves because of pride even though they had missed me. I've tracked down girlfriends that at one time I hated with a passion. But the fires of the anger and hate have cooled over time. Just because I was willing to make the first step every single one I've talked to has said that they were sorry to me without me asking them to do it. I've regained friendships that a year ago I would have thought was forever lost. Anyways I'm writing this just to suggest that you guys give it a try too. It's humbling to have to say your sorry even though you may be right but it's worth it.
 
In all seriousness though I know what you mean. I spent about 6 months many years ago tracking down people and making things right with them, just something I felt like I needed to do.
 
I've made amends in the past, but have other friends that I just can't make amends with. I can only give somebody so many chances before I have to make the decision to cut them out of my life.
 
I did that with one friend and realized soon after why we had stopped being friends in the first place.
 
ok my name is earl sinning

that was my thought, too! :lol:
i just wondered the other day if that show has encouraged people to do the same thing IRL. what a great way to help change people, just a little at a time.

and b_sinning, i think it's great that you've realized this. i have figured out that it gets easier to say "i'm sorry" each time you have to. i think that because it's so hard and so humbling, there's a great reward because of it. sometimes the hardest things in life to do are the ones that strengthen your character the most. it's too easy to go through life unchallenged, and it's great when you can recognize a challenge, step up to it, and own it, hands down.

it sounds like you are really morphing into a strong, wise person, b. how great. :heart:


edit: and bite me, sarcasmo, for yet another serious reply. :p
 
ok my name is earl sinning

No shit. I'm just trying a new approach to things because they weren't working out before. Since I've started this new approach my alternator has died, the power company some how got a reading off the meter that was 3 times more expensive than any other month I've had the place and I wasn't even there most of the time, and every bill known to man has become due at the same time. I think I must have run over a black cat or something.
 
No shit. I'm just trying a new approach to things because they weren't working out before. Since I've started this new approach my alternator has died, the power company some how got a reading off the meter that was 3 times more expensive than any other month I've had the place and I wasn't even there most of the time, and every bill known to man has become due at the same time. I think I must have run over a black cat or something.

no, but since you're working on good karma, the bad karma has to do it's thing for your past so you really can start fresh. :fly: a catch-up of sorts.
 
I am not one for ongoing arguments so I completely see your point. I was in a fight with a close friend a little while back but we made amends after about 6 months maybe? As of right now though I cant really think of anyone I left on bad terms with. There is one ex girlfriend but I tried getting in touch with her and she wanted nothing to do with me. I treated her like shit though so I really wasnt expected to hear back from her.

One of the best things my dad ever taught me was to never stay mad. It is hard for me to get pissed at someone and not talk about it.
 
In all seriousness though I know what you mean. I spent about 6 months many years ago tracking down people and making things right with them, just something I felt like I needed to do.

Utah sure has some nice wide open spaces huh? Great for hiding bodies...

edit: And btw, I'd rather just hold a grudge. :)
 
I think trying to make amends is a good thing, but I also think there are times when it is just better to "let sleeping dogs lie." I hate conflict and would rather just wish well thoughts and move on with my life instead of possibly having some one yell at me.

Still, more power to you, for doing what you can and want to do, to make your life better.