Love is a Battlefield

b_sinning

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What's the status of your love life and your strategy for the future to make it better?



I'm married but lately my wife and I have not been communicating and just driving each other nuts in general. I'm pretty sure we would be seperated if we didn't have a son. It's obvious both of us prefer to be at work rather than spend time together. We never argue or fight in front of him and actually don't do it much when he's not around. Just a lack of chemistry lately.


I do love her even though she's driving me nuts so I'm going to do my best to try to open up to her more and listen and get involved with her life more. I plan to add some romance back into our relationship and just try harder.
 

BigDov

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I'll say this only because I've experienced the same thing you're going through- WORK ON IT AND WORK ON IT QUICKLY!!!!

Obviously you love this woman otherwise you wouldn't have married her. You need to kind of revert back to that "I'm absolutely wild about you" stage where you were SO in love with her that nothing else really mattered. She is (I hope) the complete center of your world, and you need to treat her as such. Win her back, so to speak......... :)

At the same time though, a serious heart to heart talk wouldn't hurt anything either- get a babysitter for the night, go grab a nice dinner and then go somewhere and talk. Civil like adults; don't let your emotions get the best of you, and explain to her that she can't let hers get in the way of the conversation either. BOTH of you have to work on this though, it can't just be you.


The status of my love life?? Awesome :) Strategy for the future to make it better? Vinyl sheets and a few gallons of peanut oil :D
 

BigDov

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dreamwalker said:
Good luck, that's all I can say. Been there, done that, didn't work.
April23 said:
Ahh... but it can work for sure. Takes two willing parties thats all it needs.
I'm here to say that it does work- I was going through the EXACT same thing as our friend b_sinning. Shit like that is a wake-up call. You either decide to fight for the person you love or you don't. We didn't really make any compromises in our relationship either, just gained a better understanding of each other that allowed us to grow closer and move forward. I honestly can't imagine how horrible my life would be, or how horrible a person I'd be if I'd lost my wife during that time...... for really reals.

b_sinning, if you come back and read this, she IS worth every effort you can give to her and your relationship with her.

:heart:
 

b_sinning

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I've already sat her down and we recognized the fact there is probelms right now. I let her know I was willing to do whatever we needed to do to set things right, counselling whatever. It'll get better but it takes time and both of us have to try hard not to say something we would regret to each other, but I think we're both trying.
 

BigDov

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b_sinning said:
I've already sat her down and we recognized the fact there is probelms right now. I let her know I was willing to do whatever we needed to do to set things right, counselling whatever. It'll get better but it takes time and both of us have to try hard not to say something we would regret to each other, but I think we're both trying.
At least you've taken the first and hardest step; both of you recognizing that your relationship needs some work :)
 

shamwow

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I've been in similar straights myself lately and as said above, it takes work and open discussion.
 

fly

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Do your best man, but don't drag it out. Both people have to want to try. In all honesty, its probably not a good sign if you've let it get this far off track. Relationships are something that constantly need tending. So if you do get it back on track, you both are going to need to learn how to keep it that way, or you'll end right back up where you were.

But if you can recognize that it isn't gonna work, you have to cut everyone's loses (including your kid's) and get out. Don't beat a dead horse.

BTW, I didn't read anyone else's replies. :fly: