Lessons Learned from 80s Movies

The Indiana Jones movies showed me how bad the Nazis really were, that archeology can be cool, to always keep your eye on the prize, a whip is a handy fashion accessory, and never ever give up even if there is a whole bunch of snakes.



I can't wait until the new one comes out.
 
Bloodsport showed me to always make a face when I kick someone so it hurts more.

Can't Buy Me Love taught me that you actually can buy me love.

Loverboy taught me to order extra anchovies if I needed a teen age gigolo.

Commando taught me to never believe Arnold when he says he'll kill you last.
 
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I'm Gonna Get You Sucka taught me that if given the chance always take the window not the stairs, that KUNG-FU Joe is a master of KUNG-FU, KARATE, JIU-JITSU, and all kinds of other shit you ain't never heard of, and that the bitch better have my money.

Coming to America taught me that you start out mopping the floor just like you guys. But now... now I'm washing lettuce. Soon I'll be on fries; then the grill. And pretty soon, I'll make assistant manager, and that's when the big bucks start rolling in.
 
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Doctor Detroit taught me that if I'm ever to be a pimp I will need a metal gauntlet to wear.


Highlander taught me that there can only be one and not to fight on Holy ground.


Overboard taught me if a good looking rich bitch stiffs you on a bill it's for the best to kidnap her and make her raise your kids and clean your house.
 
i learned that railroad tracks are cool and if you follow them, you might find a dead body.

i learned never to throw water on a cute furball (and a furby can get wet without consequence.)

i learned that flying in a spaceship with unusual creatures is very comforting...and crossing the railroad tracks can take you back home.

i also learned that robert stack was perfect for narrating unsolved mysteries.
 
From Soul Man I learned all I need to be a believable black man is a bunch of self tanner.


National Lampoon's Vacation taught me to always sniff a sandwich before eating it, family road trips are hard on the dad, and test the temperature of pool water before just jumping in.