Just another day, part 2

BigDov

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Oct 14, 2004
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I'll title this one, BigDov's Search For A Higher Truth & Enlightenment; OR The Search For The Spirit Of The Season


As I was driving in to work this morning, there's an office building for a local hotel chain that is just decorated to the nuts with lights. Of course, everybody's slamming their brakes on to gawk and get a good look at...... I on the other hand am cussing at the idiots who are doing this EVERY single day :mad:

But it did get me to thinking, "Is there more to the Spirit of the Season than gaudy lights, stupid overdone symbols and spending assloads of money every year?" I'm here to tell you that YES, there is.

I got to work, and knew in my heart what I must do, so I went to it.

I asked my good friend Apu Basilarakthoonari what his definition of the Spirit of the Season was. His answer to me- "In my native country, we roast camel nuts over an open fire and celebrate the season by taking our yearly communal bath." Well, thanks a lot Apu. He also told me that he believes that taking his picture would steal his soul, but I managed to sneak one anyway:
ApuBasiliarakthoonari.jpg


I sit in a cube with a lot of foot traffic going by, so I was able to snag my good friend Helmut VonKlaustenberg and ask him what he thought about the Spirit of the Season. You can see his reply; thanks a lot Helmut:
HelmutVonKlaustenberg.jpg


Not one to be easily discouraged, I waited for another hapless victim/friend to wander by. Unfortunately, the next passerby was my pal Jose Garcia Ramirez-Ramirez. I think my Hispanic brother is a little confused about how things work here. His answer- "WEESSTSIIIIYEEED YO!!!" I could do nothing but shake my head:
JoseGarciaRamirezRamirez.jpg


Well, at this point, I was starting to get the idea that maybe people just don't like this time of year anymore. I find it odd myself, but whatever. I was about to give up for the day, when Jason came by. Good old Jason. Steadfast pal of mine Jason. Honest opinion Jason. Fuckerball Jason, such hate:
Jason2.jpg


cont,
 
I heard a jolly laugh coming down the hall all of a sudden so I kind of lightened up a bit and got ready to intercept the mysterious laugher. To my surprise, it was a brownie-eating Santa!!!! :heart: Santa!!!! I asked friend Santa what he was laughing about- "I got the last brownie beeyatch!!!! HO-HO-HO!!!" Fuck.
Santa.jpg


I had to get up and do some stuff, so I took my trusty camera with me to see what else I could see. I talked to this group of people, and apparently I interrupted something, I dunno. Shorty McHandinpants was a little pissed that I messed up his ass-rubbing he was giving himself. Little punk:
ShortyMcHandinpants.jpg


I did manage to find another character of the Season. My pal Little Maddy Patty. I asked him what he was feeling about the Spirit of the Season. "Hey, fuck you buddy!" was his prompt reply. Wow, I'm really batting a thousand today:
Scrooge.jpg


Out to the production floor I went...... I think they're a more compassionate group out there, or at least they used to be. I found Gomez the Garbageman dutifully pushing his trash hopper around the floor, but he didn't want to stop and talk. I managed to snap a picture as he was walking away...... note the hat though. I know it's impossible to read there, but it says "Yo :heart: Jesus" on the back of it. Gomez has something close to the Spirit, or does he? When I got his picture, he was swearing at that poor sap kneeling on the floor tieing his shoe....... how sad:
garbageman.jpg


cont,
 
I'd just about had it. Back into the office I went, wandering aimlessly, listlessly and without a purpose. To quote a famous movie funnyman, I was one morose motherfucker. But wait! What's this? I found a little something on a co-worker's desk! There's hope for this place yet!! Oh. Nevermind. Just another stupid overdone symbol of the Season:
snowmancane.jpg


I am truly saddened by this day :(
 
BigDov said:
Cool. Great. Splendid. I hear you're horribly overweight too, but that doesn't mean I believe everything I hear either.........
If its on the internet, it must be true.
 
Al Sharpton said:
you shoulda knocked the old man down and taken his brownie from him

I hid his shoes from him- he's got one leg that's shorter than the other, so he's got these really weird platform type shoes that he wears. Show him for waving that brownie in my face.....
 
BigDov said:
I hid his shoes from him- he's got one leg that's shorter than the other, so he's got these really weird platform type shoes that he wears. Show him for waving that brownie in my face.....


yeah
now the mother fucker can only walk in circles