it's spange's golden...

bast_imret

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I thought you might like that. Theac suggested it one day while I was taking a crap at Barnes & Noble and talking to him on my cellphone.
 

Sp`ange

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You didnt get no bast baste?

nope. Nor did I get a Pandora Paddling or a JJ Jerk. Didn't even get a theac lips smack.

Though, after using theac's bathroom, I now know better than to fuck with him.

This is his reading material.

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On that note, I think this should be the new :theac: smilie.

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It's like is ninja skills and fucking with Sarcasmo all rolled in to one.














oh yeah.































almost forgot.






























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bast_imret

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Oct 26, 2004
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The King's Gold/Babes

Scene 1:

In the olden days, there was this sweet king that had mounds of gold and babes. These pirates decided to steal the mounds and surrounded the castle and everybody freaked, except the king who was like “Chill homies, I’ll handle this crap.”

The pirates stood outside the castle walls and were like “You think you are so cool, but guess what, you’re not. Good luck dying!” Then the king replied “Yeah right. How would you like to meet my best friends?”

Then out of nowhere there was a small sound of a guitar wailing really really hard behind the hills. The wailing started getting louder and louder and louder. Then out of nowhere there was this one sweet ass ninja standing on top of a huge hill. Everybody was like “Woooooooooooow!” He was wearing all black and he had this jet red guitar in his hands. Then smoke smoked over the hills like trains. But the smoke was ninjas. And the pirates saw about a billion ninjas with guitars standing on top this his huge hill. And they started to wail…

When the ninjas wailed on their guitars, the pirates started spraying diarrhea on each other and loved it. And when they wailed harder, the pirates sprayed harder. As the ninjas sauntered down the hill, the pirates’ chests and butts exploded. (They died from this.) Then the ninjas finally reached the boss pirate who was really huge. Out of nowhere the boss pirate pulled out this baby banjo and tried to fiddle with it like a little baby-baby. The ninjas were like “Yeah right.” and all the billions of ninjas surrounded the boss pirate. Half of the ninjas all combined to form the biggest guitar in the universe. The other half formed the second biggest boner in the universe. Then the huge guitar pointed right at the pirate, who was like “Holy CRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAP!” Before the pirate could even do anything, the super boner slapped against the guitar making the hugest wail ever to happen anywhere ever. The pirate exploded so hard that every single one of his kids he would have had exploded and all of his grandparents exploded along with his neighbors and people who he merely said “hello” to.

Then there was this huge concert at the castle. All the babes in the castle morphed into this humongous female crotch. The huge boner and crotch porked softly, while slamming into the guitar and wailing. And guess what, the king sat on top of this huge pile of gold and babes and laughed his frigg’n ass off about how stupid the pirates were.

END


-this script is so hot it could make Janet Reno open up a paint can with her ding dong.
 

bast_imret

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The Ultimate Battle

Scene 1:

Dark smoke fills the scene and pump up music slowly gets louder. The audience sees a ninja and his girlfriend eating at a super expensive restaurant. The girlfriend is so hot that steam is coming out of her mouth or hair. Some old idiot is sitting by the couple. The idiot is giving the girlfriend "the eye" and popping like 16 boners. But the ninja sees the boners and the music really pumps up. The audience knows this guy is dead meat for sure. But out of nowhere, the old idiot pulls off his jacket to show that he is a pirate with lasers and everything. The ninja is like yeah right who cares and then pops the biggest boner ever, bigger than the biggest blackest boner alive. The ninja's boner smashes the entire restaurant. Every single one of the pirate's boners explodes while making a whistling sound. The ninja looks back at his girlfriend. She smiles and they pork.

END


-While writing this script, I head-butt my dog so hard that we both screamed.
 

Sp`ange

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I seem to recalling giving you a backrub when you were whining about theac getting one. Then you whined that I was too rough with your flabby muscles. :p Next time I'll skip all the work and just go with a good paddling crybaby.

:drool: the backrub was nice. though, I like front rubs too. ;)

Can you make the smiley about 20% bigger and double the rate of the flash?

there's no delay on the flash and 20% is the difference between 90px and 108px. BTW: I like front rubs too.