Food The (not so) delicious food thread

The one thing I hate about where I live is that I'm like a 30 minute drive from the nearest Popeye's.
I dont get it often cause it gives me the shits, but sometimes you just want it y'know?

I used to go to a local chain here called Elmer’s and get a yuge breakfast for dinner, even though I knew full well I’d have the explosive gurgley squirts as soon as I got to my car afterward. I always made sure to eat at the location closest to home or another suitable shitter. Totally worth it.
 
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Popeyes is exactly 2.2 miles from my driveway.

Weird thing too. Their eat-in restaurant side is open. Almost all restaurants here that have drive thrus are closed to walk in traffic, but not Popeyes or the IHOP next door, as if anyone gets that to go.
 
Popeyes is exactly 2.2 miles from my driveway.

Weird thing too. Their eat-in restaurant side is open. Almost all restaurants here that have drive thrus are closed to walk in traffic, but not Popeyes or the IHOP next door, as if anyone gets that to go.
Since I last looked it up, apparently one has opened 4.3 miles from my house!

 
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i made dis

It's back in the press (3D printed thing I threw together, which is working pretty decent) and it'll be in there overnight. Brining tomorrow, drying a few days after that, then getting vacuum sealed and sitting in the basement or garage for a couple of months.
 
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Cooking up some ground beef chili.

Beef, kidney beans, onion, peppers, shallots, beer, crushed tomatoes, garlic powder, chili powder, a little cayenne and cinnamon powder, salt and pepper.

Make enough for everyone!
Ok, we'll settle for a post dinner review.
 
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Update: Chili is slammin. Gonna make some cornbread to go with.
You've got a smoker - make some of my famous "complain to HR" chili sometime. I'm proud as hell of this recipe.

Ingredients:
  • 3-4 lbs smoked/shredded meat (pork shoulder, beef blade roast, whatever)
  • half a dozen strips bacon, diced
  • 2 medium onions, diced
  • half a dozen fresh jalapenos, diced/seeded
  • 1 big or 2 medium red bell peppers, diced
  • 4-5 cloves garlic, minced
  • 1/2 cup apple juice
  • Juice of 1 lime
  • 1/4 cup apple cider vinegar
  • 1 can crushed tomatoes or diced tomatoes (make sure there’s no italian spices or whatever in it)
  • 1 can black beans
  • 1 can kidney beans
  • 1/4 cup fresh cilantro, minced (you'll want more for serving)
  • 1/4 cup brown sugar
  • Initial spice load: 2 tbsp cheap chili powder, 2 tsp each cumin, coriander, oregano, black pepper, salt.
Method:
  • Rub your hunk of meat in your favorite BBQ rub, smoke it to a good 'pulled pork sandwich' texture. For pork I use 100% applewood, for beef I use 50/50 apple/oak. Foil it for the last few hours and put a pan underneath it to collect drippings, save these for "adjusting". Shred it when it's done.
  • Fry bacon in a big pot, remove from pot, leave the fat in there.
  • Fry onions/peppers/garlic in the bacon fat until they're starting to brown. Drain most of the fat out.
  • Add half the smoked meat and the remaining ingredients to the pot.
  • Cover and simmer for a few hours until the beans are fully cooked, stirring frequently. Pay close attention to the temperature, you don't want to burn the chili at the bottom of the pot. Also don't make sure it doesn't dry out (this isn't a very "wet" recipe) - add water occasionally as needed to keep this from happening.
  • Once the beans are cooked, start tasting and "adjusting" until it tastes good - try to find a "hole" in the flavor and fill it with something. I'll add drippings from the smoker (smokiness and umami), soy sauce or worcestershire sauce (umami), sugar (sweet), lime juice or vinegar (tang), apple juice (sweet plus a slight tang), cayenne powder or whatever hot sauce you've got around (heat), cilantro or oregano (savory)... whatever you think it needs. If you add dry herbs/spices, let them cook in for several minutes before you taste or you could add too much.
  • Transfer to a crock pot, set to low and cook for several hours, stirring occasionally and watching the moisture level. The meat will disintegrate over this time into what's best described as meaty goodness... "meat paste" doesn't sound appetizing but that's exactly what it is. Adjust the flavor again if you have to.
  • About an hour before serving, add in the other half of the meat for texture.
Serve with shredded marble cheese, fresh cilantro and "restaurant style" thick sour cream.
 
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Cooking up some ground beef chili.

Beef, kidney beans, onion, peppers, shallots, beer, crushed tomatoes, garlic powder, chili powder, a little cayenne and cinnamon powder, salt and pepper.

That's pretty damn close to Friday nights chili. I just put in some serranos in lieu of the cayenne and cinnamon, per the wife's tastes, ya know, because.
 
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