Yup, at the Lyric Opera house in beautiful Baltimore, Maryland. The place only sold top shelf liquor and gangsta music was played in the bathrooms. I scored the tickets through my roommate’s mother who gets them from work. My roommate and I counted 11 white people in attendance, including us, and figured there were about 2,400 black people – hahaha. But it was a great time, and since Cedric is one of my favorite comedians I laughed my ass off, and even when I didn’t laugh, the massive black lady next to me was laughing so hard I laughed at her. Here are a few of the memorable quotes from the show that I can remember:
“Ya’ll [ADMIN EDIT]s joke on George Bush and shit, but I think that motherfucker is as black as you is. I’m serious ya’ll, Bush gots a ton of [ADMIN EDIT] in him. I mean dat [ADMIN EDIT] walked right back to office when we know no one voted for him and was like “this is my house motherfucker, I’m president.””
“Al Sharpton can’t fucking be president with a goddamned perm. Are you fucking kidding me [ADMIN EDIT]? No one can be president with a goddamn perm. What if there was some special event that Revered Sharpton had to be on TV for at like 6 in the morning and his hair wasn’t done up, [ADMIN EDIT] be looking like a damn muppet with his hair all fucked up, trying to tell us terrorists be attackin’ and shit.”
“I know I was supposed to start the show at 8, but shit this is a black show ya’ll lucky I’m fucking out here before 8:30. Shit, [ADMIN EDIT]s usually don’t even come outside before the sun go down.”
“Damn [ADMIN EDIT], it be cold up in this bitch, it’s so cold even heat is lookin’ for heat.”
“[ADMIN EDIT]s is trying to figure out if Barry Bonds is on steroids, I’m trying to figure out how the fuck that [ADMIN EDIT] bats with such a big ass head. Mother fucker be a big bobble headed motherfucker.”
I will also mention that I felt terribly underdressed in jeans and a t-shirt, everyone else had on their Sunday best.
“Ya’ll [ADMIN EDIT]s joke on George Bush and shit, but I think that motherfucker is as black as you is. I’m serious ya’ll, Bush gots a ton of [ADMIN EDIT] in him. I mean dat [ADMIN EDIT] walked right back to office when we know no one voted for him and was like “this is my house motherfucker, I’m president.””
“Al Sharpton can’t fucking be president with a goddamned perm. Are you fucking kidding me [ADMIN EDIT]? No one can be president with a goddamn perm. What if there was some special event that Revered Sharpton had to be on TV for at like 6 in the morning and his hair wasn’t done up, [ADMIN EDIT] be looking like a damn muppet with his hair all fucked up, trying to tell us terrorists be attackin’ and shit.”
“I know I was supposed to start the show at 8, but shit this is a black show ya’ll lucky I’m fucking out here before 8:30. Shit, [ADMIN EDIT]s usually don’t even come outside before the sun go down.”
“Damn [ADMIN EDIT], it be cold up in this bitch, it’s so cold even heat is lookin’ for heat.”
“[ADMIN EDIT]s is trying to figure out if Barry Bonds is on steroids, I’m trying to figure out how the fuck that [ADMIN EDIT] bats with such a big ass head. Mother fucker be a big bobble headed motherfucker.”
I will also mention that I felt terribly underdressed in jeans and a t-shirt, everyone else had on their Sunday best.
