How am I supposed to use toiletpaper in the dark?

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

I use one toilet seat cover, and then about 3 layers of 2-ply to finish off the full mummification. All I can say is that if I get a disease of some kind it will be MY choice, not from some unclean douchebag with butt crabs.

See, I avoid that sort of nonsense by just waiting till I get to the house.
I prefer the "Home Field Advantage" , if ya know what I mean.

 

[CletusJones]

See, I avoid that sort of nonsense by just waiting till I get to the house.
I prefer the "Home Field Advantage" , if ya know what I mean.

sometimes one cannot wait that long. the work poop is inevitable.

 

[thrawn]

See, I avoid that sort of nonsense by just waiting till I get to the house.
I prefer the "Home Field Advantage" , if ya know what I mean.

i'd much rather get paid to poop.

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

i'd much rather get paid to poop.

But befouling the air at home and upsetting the wife is much more fun.

 

[Sarcasmo]

See, I avoid that sort of nonsense by just waiting till I get to the house.
I prefer the "Home Field Advantage" , if ya know what I mean.

Every now and then the stars align in a certain way, and I can't wait for however many hours to get home. I'm forced into a work poop. 90% of the time though I go at home.

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

Every now and then the stars align in a certain way, and I can't wait for however many hours to get home. I'm forced into a work poop. 90% of the time though I go at home.

If I have an emergency and have to go at work, I do the "Splinter Cell Hallway Split" manuver in the stall and then just play bombadiere.

 

[Bubbles]

The door handles to restrooms are nastier than the seats.....unless you are a girl. Some stupid girls have this amazing abilty to hover over the bowl and spray down every inch of the seat.

 

[Syrup Beaver]

sometimes one cannot wait that long. the work poop is inevitable.

I float majestically above the toilet, I never sit on public ones.

And I've gone everywhere, busses, planes, trains, filth ridden beachside toilets, etc.

First one must lay toilet paper in the bowl itself to avoid splashback though

 

[CletusJones]

I float majestically above the toilet, I never sit on public ones.

And I've gone everywhere, busses, planes, trains, filth ridden beachside toilets, etc.

First one must lay toilet paper in the bowl itself to avoid splashback though

I can't float like that. I just create my own ass-gasket with many layers of toilet paper. I'm not picky, anywhere there's enough TP to make the ass-gasket I'm good to go.

I also cover the water to prevent splashbacks, I thought I was the only one who did that.

 

[JAXvillain]

I am one of about 5 men on my floor at work...we have the same size bathroom that ~60 women on the floor share
it's kinda like having your own bathroom at work