hahaha - dude bangs virgin downs syndrome girl


Oct 1, 2004
My friend Frank has a sister who has downs syndrome. She's 4 years younger than me, although you'd never know by looking at her. I've always been real nice when she picks up the phone or I go over there to hang out. He's already told me that she thinks I'm nice, something she doesn't think about most boys that come over there.

Cut to Monday night. We all have Tuesday off for Veteran's day, so Frank and I are over at his house (he still lives with his mom) playing some xbox. His sister is in the room, playing with dolls and ocasionally watching the screen as we played. Frank's mom is out running some errands, I think she was at her mothers house. The phone rings at about 8, and it's Frank's mom, Victoria. She tells Jessica (Frank's sister) that her car has broken down and needs Frank to take a look at it. Frank, being a car mechanic leaves to go check out the car, and asked me to look after Jessica while he was gone, since she gets really upset by cars. I agree, and he leaves.

I didn't really know what to do to entertain her, so I just sat around and kinda ****ed around, and would occasionally talk to her. For the most part, she sat there and played with her dolls, talking to them. I was sitting at the computers working on an essay for an Archaeology class when she asked me the following:

"What are doing John?"
"Oh, I'm typing a paper for a class."
"Heeee you need paper for class!"
"Yep, it's pretty important. "

She trailed off for a minute, and I resumed typing. About 5 minutes later, she spoke again.

"John, I know sex" - I was taken back. What do I say to her? Do I lie, do I acknowledge that she "knows" sex, what?
"Um, I'm not sure if we should talk about that, Jessica."
"I try sex with me and it good"
"Jessica, we really shouldn't talk about this..."
"Will you try with me?"

I didn't know what to do. I was sitting there, with my mouth half opened and I'm sure there was a puddle of drool forming on the carpet pretty fast. She asked again.
"Will you try sex with me? Nobody like me like you, you so nice and pretty"

****. ****sticks. ****ing ****ersticks from planet ****. I'm getting hit on by a retarded girl. What the **** do I do?

Yeah, I ****ed her. It was her first time, and she bled. It was not pleasent, and she wailed near the end, I guess an orgasm. When we were done I went to the bathroom, cleaned up, and cried. I fixed up myself and made sure she was alright. Then I went back to my essay while she did god knows what. I didn't care, I still don't. A wave of apathy crashed upon me.

Frank showed up about 10 minutes later, and I quickly excused myself to go home. I went home and cried myself to sleep on my pillow, accompanied by the horrible imagery which will haunt me to my grave. I woke up yesterday to the phone ringing, at about 7:30. Most people know to leave me alone at 7:30 when I'm not working, but I rolled over to see the caller ID. I looked down at it, saw it was Frank's house, and answered.

"Hey John, I need to..uhm...well...ask you about...uh...something."
Me, suddendly awake, "Uh yeah, whats up?"
"Well, last night after I brought my mom home, Jessica was..acting...strangely.."
"Oh, how do you mean?"
"There was blood dripping down her leg."
"What the ****?"
"Yeah, thats what we thought, too. We are trying to figure out what happened, do you know anything?"
"No man, I don't. Thats pretty ****ed up. Say, I gotta go because my breakfast is burning." - lie
"Alright John, I'll talk to you later."

What should I do!?? Confess to him and his mom about Jessica, keep my mouth shut? Threaten her with violence if she talks?

For the record - this in not me , not my story
yeah I know it's pretty ****ed up situation , but what do you think the guy should do??
I realize that hitting an underage retarded chick is not perfectly right , but I guess she wont get any more action anytime soon (probably not for the rest of her life) so basically what the guy did was showing her that life can be quite fun sometimes

what do ya think??



Oct 1, 2004


(retired?) Google-F.U.
Mar 5, 2005
That forum always has tons of funny stuff, never can tell if it's shens though.

I remember the one about the guy shitting himself when lifting.


I just don't know what to say to this. That's so far off from anything I'd ever do that I can't even begin to form a plan as to how I'd handle it.