Going to a Funeral today

H

HifiGirly

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Nov 16, 2004
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Last Wednesday, our good friends 4 month old son was found dead in his crib at daycare. The baby was a happy healthy little boy who had never been sick. The day care lady said he had been unusually fussy that morning, but went down for his nap as usual. Our friend left work early not feeling well and when she got there to pick him up she was told he was sleeping. She went to pick him up and he was blue. The paramedics rushed him to the hospital, but the there was nothing they could do an autopsy was preformed but results won't be back for upto 8 weeks. My husband and I were devastated when we found out Thursday morning. The baby had just been at our house a couple weeks ago for our son's birthday party.

Right now I am making cookies for the meal after the funeral and I am dreading the rest of the day. It's every parents worst nightmare and this is the closest we have been to someone losing a child. My husband has know the couple since junior high, we have vacationed with them and our kids have all known each other since birth.

Anyone else been around someone who has lost a child? We are at a total loss for words and emotionally drained.
 
There is nothing you can say to console the loss of a 4 month old. Honestly. Now that I have my own child, I can see the emotional state of having to bury your own child. That's something I would never wish on anyone to have to do.

Sounds like the baby had the genes that made him pre-dispositioned to SIDS.
 
Fuck, that's awful. I couldn't even begin to imagine how they'd feel.

Extra hugs for my boy tonight.

:(
 
ChikkenNoodul said:
I have friends that lost a child, they were brutal to everyone around them when it happened, don't take it personally - it's part of the grieving process.

It sucks.

:( :heart:
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Did your friends have other kids? Our have a 3 year old girl, so they are putting a good face on for her, she doesn't really understand. I know she will be at the funeral and her cousin who is almost 3. We aren't taking our kids, our 4 year old understands death more, because our dog died in December and we basically watched him die for 6 weeks. Our 19 month old is to busy to sit still that long.
 
my brother had sids. it was an excuse to smack an infant around, or shake, and not get into trouble.


edit> i forgot shake
 
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We co-slept for a year with our younger which is a big no no according to alot of people. I got grief at work for constantly. But he is a happy healthy little boy, we got a good nights sleep every night and my husband regrets not letting our first son co-sleep.
 
I'm pretty sure it's a random biological fluke, like a murmur that makes the heart stop. You can't predict it, and you certainly can't prevent it. E slept on his stomach, side, and back, and loved to be swaddled. Sometimes we randomly die and sometimes we don't. Nature is imperfect.
 
Sarcasmo said:
I'm pretty sure it's a random biological fluke, like a murmur that makes the heart stop. You can't predict it, and you certainly can't prevent it. E slept on his stomach, side, and back, and loved to be swaddled. Sometimes we randomly die and sometimes we don't. Nature is imperfect.
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Actually, I buy the theory that it's co2 buildup, much like shallow water blackout when diving.
 
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