Fat Zombies

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smileynev

Guest
Your average zombie hungers for the raw flesh and brains of the living, correct? Once consumed, though, the zombie has no means of digesting anything since its internal organs and systems no longer function, correct? If that weren't the case it would be much easier to take one down, of course. So where does the consumed flesh and nervous system material go? On a relatively fresh zombie I'd have to assume that it ends up in the stomache. Older, more decayed zombies may have it fall direcly through their bodies, depending on what is still intact.

So, it can be concluded that the fatter a zombie is, the more successful and higher up it is on the social ladder of the zombie world.
 
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But there is a theoretical limit to zmobie fattness as it collides with survival of the fittest. If the zombie looks like Jabba the Hutt, its lack of speed will reduce its chances of catching humans and may be stuck eating grapes, lettuce, and snails...
 
smileynev said:
Thats what started this whole thought process. Without a functioning digestive system they can't.
are you sure? wouldn't it just slide out on it's own eventually? After the muscles start to relax, I'd assume that the poop would just fall out the brown starfish as they walked.
 
fly said:
But there is a theoretical limit to zmobie fattness as it collides with survival of the fittest. If the zombie looks like Jabba the Hutt, its lack of speed will reduce its chances of catching humans and may be stuck eating grapes, lettuce, and snails...

Jabba the Zombie? Don't give George Lucas any ideas. :omy:
 
fly said:
But there is a theoretical limit to zmobie fattness as it collides with survival of the fittest. If the zombie looks like Jabba the Hutt, its lack of speed will reduce its chances of catching humans and may be stuck eating grapes, lettuce, and snails...

True, true. Plus, at a certain point, the zombie would burst and all the undigested human flesh and brainmatter would spill out. But, the cleverest of zombies would figure out a way to capture more flesh even as it got slower and fatter.

Brings up a good point. Can the other zombies smell the undigested human parts inside the fat zombie and, if so, will they attack it?
 
CletusJones said:
are you sure? wouldn't it just slide out on it's own eventually? After the muscles start to relax, I'd assume that the poop would just fall out the brown starfish as they walked.

poop that existed before the zombification would fall out. But no more poop would be made, since all the enzymes and crap wouldn't exist to digest the foodstuff properly.
 
smileynev said:
Brings up a good point. Can the other zombies smell the undigested human parts inside the fat zombie and, if so, will they attack it?
Everyone knows that zombies don't eat their own. :rolleyes:

Imagine if zombies ate their own, it would be total chaos. Zombies munching on other zombies munching on dead people. It I was a zombie, I'd insist on grade A fresh human and you should too.
 
smileynev said:
poop that existed before the zombification would fall out. But no more poop would be made, since all the enzymes and crap wouldn't exist to digest the foodstuff properly.
Why would the enzymes just die like that? Wouldn't they bacteria that lives in your digestive tract continue to live on and help the enzymes?
 
CletusJones said:
Everyone knows that zombies don't eat their own. :rolleyes:

Imagine if zombies ate their own, it would be total chaos. Zombies munching on other zombies munching on dead people. It I was a zombie, I'd insist on grade A fresh human and you should too.

True, true. What happens when the human runs out, though?
 
CletusJones said:
Why would the enzymes just die like that? Wouldn't they bacteria that lives in your digestive tract continue to live on and help the enzymes?

I assume that zombification only takes place when the body is completely dead. Maybe I'm wrong.
 
smileynev said:
True, true. What happens when the human runs out, though?
When the human supply runs out the zombies will have to move on to other forms of life - dogs, cats, squirrels, etc...

After those run out it's all a crapshoot. Maybe one day you'll see a zombie eating a salad.
 
smileynev said:
I assume that zombification only takes place when the body is completely dead. Maybe I'm wrong.
I think you're wrong. I've seen people keel over and die only to wake up 30 seconds later as a zombie. There's no way that they would have completely died in that amount of time.
 
CletusJones said:
I think you're wrong. I've seen people keel over and die only to wake up 30 seconds later as a zombie. There's no way that they would have completely died in that amount of time.

Even then, the muscles that push the food through the intestines would probably no longer function.