Crazy Nighmare Neighbors.....

Sarcasmo said:
My neighbor is a really hot girl, about mid-20s. She's cool enough, and we've hung out a couple times. My only problem with her is that she is incapable of quietly shutting her front door. I think she closes it about half way, walks to the other side of the room, and then runs full sprint and slams her body against it, ensuring that when it shuts the entire southern half of the complex knows about it and somewhere in Japan a nervous seismologist double-checks his instruments. It's fucking ridiculous.
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way to get into hot chick's home AND solve the door problem:

lord flaccid: howdy ho, neighbor! it sounds like your door has a hinge broken or something, the way it keeps slamming. want me to take a look at it? lemme go get my tools and some lube.
 
Candy said:
Ever find out who was moving the magical cups? Thats some funny shit. For awhile there were these magnets for cars (advertising something that escapes me, Bubbles may remember) that were found (or stolen) by a friend of ours, and they kept surfacing on different people's cars in the general vicinity where we all lived. If I am remembering correctly they ended up on someone's car who wasent very happy about it. They were being placed in inconspicuous spots so that you would not notice it for several days.

(Sorry, off on a tangent now...)
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Yes, the magnetic sign said "AMERICA SAYS JESUS". It was on the roof of my car for the longest time, I never saw it until I was at the Chic-fil-et drive through and the guy taking my money says "Jesus" I'm all like excuse me, what? He says "Jesus" and points to the roof of my car. I laughed my ass off.
 
Bubbles said:
Yes, the magnetic sign said "AMERICA SAYS JESUS". It was on the roof of my car for the longest time, I never saw it until I was at the Chic-fil-et drive through and the guy taking my money says "Jesus" I'm all like excuse me, what? He says "Jesus" and points to the roof of my car. I laughed my ass off.
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I thought you had a convertable white mustang?
 
fly said:
Funny neighbor story...

I live in a second floor apartment. One day I come down the stairs to the bottom floor and there are 2 cups sitting on the steps. I comment to April how nice that was for someone to do. Fast forward a day or two... The cups have magically moved up about 8 steps (closer to my door). I find this hilarous that someone would move then rather than just throw them away, so I move them up a couple of more stairs to see what would happen...

The next day, some black dude is banging on my door. I open it and he accuses me of putting these cups on his porch, which I had not done. He wants ME to throw them away cause he's sure I did it. I argue with him for a minute, then realize I could do something funny out of this as I had a trashbag right by door. I pick up the trashbag and open it, thereby forcing HIM to throw the cups away (making me giggle inside). He looks at me, even angrier cause he realizes that hes gonna have to do it...

Sadly, before he can throw them away, April comes up to the door, grabs the cups out of his hand, throws them away, and slams the door in his face.
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Hey I'm disappointed by this story ... when you said 'how nice that was for someone to do' I thought you had some cool neighbor who was giving you their coffee mugs or something and putting them closer and closer to your door ... shucks no happy endings.
 
Before I bought my house in Florida we (Keith ,the kids and I) lived in a duplex on a cul de sac. Everyone in the 'circle' pretty much partied together almost nightly. Amy use to came over and party and play darts too. Of course there was one drunk neighborhood whore Jody that 'did' a few of the married men and flirted with all the other men (and women she wasn't picky really). No big deal everyone knew she was loose but she was alot of fun to party with.

One late night all the guys were sitting on the cars drinking and chatting with Jody and I came out and sat with them and chatted too, every thing was going great. About 1/2 to an hour rolls by and out of literally no where drunk Jody gets off the bed of the truck that keith and I were sitting on and says something like 'oh I better not sit by your boyfriend' and she gets up and sits on a different car. I am thinking 'huh??' and don't say anything. Then she continues to say something similar again and again.

I pretty much just SNAPPED and jumped off the car and proceeded to choke her to death ... basically just to shut her up with the babbling nonsense. It took all the men to brake me off her. I was completely sober and she was definately trying to provoke me.

Needless to say that pretty much stopped all the fun nightly parties. Jody didn't come out very often after that and I bought a house a few months later.

All my neighbors of the house I bought are just wonderful , normal professional type people. Happy Ending :)
 
fly said:
you comin? I need someone to yell at them.
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I do not yell! I can just being my awesome self, who is universally loved and adored.

Closest I can come to these stories is that my brothers and I like fire. Well I like fire, and guns. So on memorial day we were sat in the back yard with an oil drum, making gunpowder charges, then blowing the drum like 60 feet in the air when the bitchy neighbors called the sheriff. We were only going to blow it up a couple times, but he said we had to stop no matter how cool it was because of the aformentioned bitches, bitching. So we went and got the firepower and proceeded to shoot at bottles in the backyard off the backporch until 1am-ish. Not small guns either, an Enfield Mk2 .30, Swiss K11? 7.5mm, and a nice tactical 12ga.

I would say to candy, get a party permit (you could get them in all the cities I 've lived in) and proceed to have an all night rave.
 
FlamingGlory said:
I would say to candy, get a party permit (you could get them in all the cities I 've lived in) and proceed to have an all night rave.
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Party permit :cool: ... Holy shit never heard of that. I wish I could get Candy a party permit for Christmas :heart:
 
Bubbles said:
Problem is she would need it for every weekend and each permit is only good for the specified party time, usually one day and night.
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She would be their best customer!:D
 
I did call the cops once on my neighbors. It was 3 in the morning on a weeknight. I lived in an upstairs apartment. These people were blasting their music so loud that you could hear Celion Dion singing. I had to go to work the next day and between 2 and 3 am I just couldn't stand it anymore and called them. They eventually got evicted. These are the type of people who die because they decide to use their habatci gril as an indoor heater...
 
JJ Lady said:
I did call the cops once on my neighbors. It was 3 in the morning on a weeknight. I lived in an upstairs apartment. These people were blasting their music so loud that you could hear Celion Dion singing. I had to go to work the next day and between 2 and 3 am I just couldn't stand it anymore and called them. They eventually got evicted. These are the type of people who die because they decide to use their habatci gril as an indoor heater...
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Had ex-roomates that were stupid for similar reasons. Their major issue was that they decided in the last few months that I was there to sell weed to anybody as well as blast music and a large mutt that cried all the time because it was kept in a cage all day. Apparantly they made good money from it as the last week I was there they got a bowflex. The very next day after I finally got out they got busted, and I bet they think I called them in.
 
I live right next door to a rather shady hotel. The cops are constantly checking up on this place: rolling through the parking lot, parking behind trees and/or bushes in front or behind my house...you get the picture. Anyway, one night at about 2:00 in the morning I got tired of listening to an extreemely loud mouthed bitch yell about how she was going to beat another girls ass. I called the cops on them and by the time they showed up, the people next door had taken the loud crap inside. I have since heard her at ALL HOURS of the day or night always screaming and cussing and generally making a racket. I haven't heard her in days and I just talked to one of the guys that hangs out with various people over there and he was telling me how shocked he was that the girl got in trouble with the hotel management and got kicked out and arrested.......shocking? I don't think so :rolleyes:
 
Bubbles said:
I live right next door to a rather shady hotel. The cops are constantly checking up on this place: rolling through the parking lot, parking behind trees and/or bushes in front or behind my house...you get the picture. Anyway, one night at about 2:00 in the morning I got tired of listening to an extreemely loud mouthed bitch yell about how she was going to beat another girls ass. I called the cops on them and by the time they showed up, the people next door had taken the loud crap inside. I have since heard her at ALL HOURS of the day or night always screaming and cussing and generally making a racket. I haven't heard her in days and I just talked to one of the guys that hangs out with various people over there and he was telling me how shocked he was that the girl got in trouble with the hotel management and got kicked out and arrested.......shocking? I don't think so :rolleyes:
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OMG - no wonder your mom rolls by to check\spy on you ... she may be genuinely concerned about your neighborhood.:heart:
 
Bubbles said:
AHAHAHAHHAHAHHAAAA......no. They are stalking me, they did it in my last house and that one was in a nice neighborhood.
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Ya'll should go get restraining orders at the same time. Like group discount.
 
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