Church and raising a kid

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wanko80

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Jul 31, 2006
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Is anyone here in a relationship where your spouse or fuck buddy or whatever goes to church and you don't? Or the other way around?

My wife was raised in the church, and she thinks it is an important thing to do and she wants it to be a part of our kid's life. I was not raised in the church. I did, however, go through a period where I did go to church and thought I wanted to be part of one. That has since passed.

As a couple, we haven't really gone to church much, just sporadically. That would mostly be because I don't really want to go and it's hard for her to go on her own because she wants me to go with her.

I'm in a funny situation because I want to talk her into not going and not having our kid be a part of church because I will not go with them as I don't like church (for more than the religion). Yet, I don't want to force her to or take away what she believes is important.

Any others that have faced a similar situation?
 
yeah friend of mine - we called him Duck - was engaged to another friend of ours, Nora. he wasn't very religious but she was and would always want him to go to temple with her but he preferred to spend his time playing pyramid then one day she went to pray and the toasters shot up the temple because tigh had hidden weapons there, they almost got cally too but she and nicholas were fine. duck was heartbroken and agreed to suicide bomb the NCP graduation ceremony but baltar wasn't there and gaeta didn't warn the chief in time
 
Take the kid to church sporatically, it needs to know what is out there and make decisions for themselves when they get older if they believe or not.

I went to church for 20 something years, and I turned out fine. :lol: No longer go to church, but I am glad I know both sides of the fence.
 
My parents made me go for 19 years, three times a week. I even went after I left home. They don't like me too much now that I choose not to go. Let the kid choose. Or force him to go and he can turn out as upstanding as April and I.
 
My parents did what Ape is suggesting and I am very happy it was never forced down my throat. Although my family is not religious they gave us the choice to be if we wanted to.
 
I would be fine going occasionally. However, my wife wants her to be raised in the church to have the church people as "part of her family".
 
wonko80 said:
I would be fine going occasionally. However, my wife wants her to be raised in the church to have the church people as "part of her family".
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Thats fine and dandy, but she can go do the kid stuff like Sunday school and choir with the other kids. Stuff you aren't required to be present for. I knew at about the age of 12 that it wasn't for me.
 
Jonny_B said:
isn't it pretty obvious that he didn't?
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When we got married, I was more in the church mode. Since years have passed, I have changed and decided it is not for me.

We did not specifically discuss this issue, but since she hadn't gone to church for at least 6 months before the baby was even conceived, I didn't think to bring it up.

Coqui said:
He could have and just submitted to her even though he has a problem with it.
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You mean go to church with them? What's the point of me sitting through 2 hours of stuff I don't agree with?

Edit: She's the fucking women. She submits to me.
 
I say you dress up like Jesus every night and scare the shit outta your kid. No matter what the wife does he will be to scared to go to church and you are in the clear.
 
wonko80 said:
When we got married, I was more in the church mode. Since years have passed, I have changed and decided it is not for me.

We did not specifically discuss this issue, but since she hadn't gone to church for at least 6 months before the baby was even conceived, I didn't think to bring it up.


You mean go to church with them? What's the point of me sitting through 2 hours of stuff I don't agree with?

Edit: She's the fucking women. She submits to me.
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Well you already answereed what I meant with the first part of this post.
 
My wife and I agreed before my son was born that she would deal with his spiritual development and I would do the sex talk and things of that nature.

She takes him to church. I do not go. She knows I dislike churches. She feels that when I do go just to make her happy that I'm going for the wrong reasons and that it cheaps the whole church experience. So I don't go. My God knows where I live and come hang out if he wants. I'm sorry their god doesn't make housecalls.
 
Haha, breeders.

You took this person to breed with. You determined that she contained some characteristics that made her worthy of your semen and/or ability to procreate the species. Because of this fact, you should believe that she felt the same about you. Both of you should tell each other their sides of the story and come up with a mutual understanding. Seeing as thought both of you trust each other and feel each other is worthy of their spawn, both of you have valid points to the argument.

So she is "religious" and you are not. Take your spawn to other religious rituals and ceremonies to broaden his/her horizons. Attend Sundays with mommy because she appriciates it and her religious experience is more positive and powerful because her spawn is there, but show the boy/girl there is more to the world than your locality.

:heart:
 
April23 said:
Take the kid to church sporatically, it needs to know what is out there and make decisions for themselves when they get older if they believe or not.

I went to church for 20 something years, and I turned out fine. :lol: No longer go to church, but I am glad I know both sides of the fence.
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werd, its important to see both aspects of belief. it is good our parents weren't crazy evangelical psycho baptists. being raised with a baised view on life is not good for the mind.
 
I was drug to church every sunday when i was a kid. I resisted more and more when i was about 10 or so. Finally i was able to not go.

Now that im married, i just have to go for the Christmas eve service since its what her family does and if i dont go, im in deep shit. so whatever.

Our son is in the churches daycare 2 days a week. Nothing religious about it, just daycare. And he goes to church on sundays with his Grandma and Great-Grandma, which im fine with. He plays with other kids and i get yardwork done.
 
animepark13 said:
werd, its important to see both aspects of belief. it is good our parents weren't crazy evangelical psycho baptists. being raised with a baised view on life is not good for the mind.
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They sure did impose their beliefs on us and frowned when we didn't follow the rest of the sheep.
 
April23 said:
Take the kid to church sporatically, it needs to know what is out there and make decisions for themselves when they get older if they believe or not.

I went to church for 20 something years, and I turned out fine. :lol: No longer go to church, but I am glad I know both sides of the fence.
Click to expand...

mikey said:
My parents made me go for 19 years, three times a week. I even went after I left home. They don't like me too much now that I choose not to go. Let the kid choose. Or force him to go and he can turn out as upstanding as April and I.
Click to expand...

BeerAd said:
My parents did what Ape is suggesting and I am very happy it was never forced down my throat. Although my family is not religious they gave us the choice to be if we wanted to.
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