best comeback ever vr. post your own?

Penis Envy

Penis Envy

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Sep 2, 2005
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The Best Comeback Line Ever:
Marine Corps General Reinwald was interviewed on the radio the recently and you have to read his reply to the lady who interviewed him concerning guns and children. Regardless of how you feel about gun laws you got to love this! This
is one of the best comeback lines of all time. It is a portion of a National Public Radio (NPR) interview between a female broadcaster and US Marine Corps General Reinwald who was about to sponsor a Boy Scout Troop visiting his
military installation.

FEMALE INTERVIEWER: So, General Reinwald, what things are you going to teach these young boys when they visit your base?
GENERAL REINWALD: We're going to teach them climbing, canoeing, archery and shooting.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Shooting! That's a bit irresponsible, isn't it?
GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see why, they'll be properly supervised on the rifle range.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: Don't you admit that this is a terribly dangerous activity to be teaching children?
GENERAL REINWALD: I don't see how. We will be teaching them proper rifle discipline before they even touch a firearm.
FEMALE INTERVIEWER: But you're equipping them to become violent killers...
GENERAL REINWALD: Well, you're equipped to be a prostitute, but you're not one, are you? The radio went silent and the interview ended.
 
It was in the Washington Post... the title of the article was "Best Comeback Line Ever."

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m. on Friday.

Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview.

Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need."

"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."

Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence.

"I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realise that you are screwing a pumpkin?'

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there and then looked me straight in the face and said,


"A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"


http://www.avolites.org.uk/jokes/best-comeback.htm
 
POMPUS ASSHAT (responding to some percieved slight): Do you know who I am?

EVERYDAY SLOB: No. Do you know who I am?

POMPUS ASSHAT: No.

EVERYDAY SLOB: Well, then we're even!
 
Highbrow: "Forgive me for the intelligence of my argument; I'd forgotten that you were a Member of Parliament."

Lowbrow: "If I had a dick, this is where I'd tell you to suck it." Best part is, that line was uttered from the mouth of Betty White. Hot.
 
bast_imret said:
Highbrow: "Forgive me for the intelligence of my argument; I'd forgotten that you were a Member of Parliament."

Lowbrow: "If I had a dick, this is where I'd tell you to suck it." Best part is, that line was uttered from the mouth of Betty White. Hot.
Click to expand...
Betty White? no way.
 
this is from 3 months ago, when I visited fly and april:

FLY: elpmis did you drink all the creme soda last night?

*awkward silence*

ELPMIS: can I have sex with your cat Steve?
 
elpmis said:
this is from 3 months ago, when I visited fly and april:

FLY: elpmis did you drink all the creme soda last night?

*awkward silence*

ELPMIS: can I have sex with your cat Steve?
Click to expand...
god how i wish i had been there and said i was a cat named steve..

:(
 
b_sinning said:
It was in the Washington Post... the title of the article was "Best Comeback Line Ever."

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, a 22-year-old white male, resident of Dacula, GA, in a pumpkin patch at 11:38 p.m. on Friday.

Lawrence will be charged with lewd and lascivious behaviour, public indecency and public intoxication at the Gwinnett County courthouse on Monday.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch he decided to stop. "You know, a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside and there was no one around here for miles. At least I thought there wasn't," he stated in a phone interview.

Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his purposes, cut a hole in it and proceeded to satisfy his alleged "need."

"I guess I was just really into it, you know?" he commented with evident embarrassment. In the process, Lawrence apparently failed to notice a Gwinnett County police car approaching and was unaware of his audience until officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

"It was an unusual situation, that's for sure," said officer Taylor.
"I walked up to (Lawrence) and he's...just working away at this pumpkin."

Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence.

"I just went up and said, 'Excuse me sir, but do you realise that you are screwing a pumpkin?'

He froze and was clearly very surprised that I was there and then looked me straight in the face and said,


"A pumpkin? Damn...is it midnight already?"


http://www.avolites.org.uk/jokes/best-comeback.htm
Click to expand...


So what, before midnight he had been screwing a carriage? I don't get it.
 
elpmis said:
this is from 3 months ago, when I visited fly and april:

FLY: elpmis did you drink all the creme soda last night?

*awkward silence*

ELPMIS: can I have sex with your cat Steve?
Click to expand...


:drool: creme soda
 
An 86 year old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the Desk.... The Receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor For today??"
There's something wrong with my dick", he replied. The Receptionist became Irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say Things like that."
"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you", he said.

The Receptionist replied; "Now you've caused some embarrassment in this Room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with Your ear or something and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in Private".


The man replied, 'You shouldn't ask people questions in a room full Strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone."
The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered.
The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes??"
There 's something wrong with my ear", he stated.
The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her Advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, Sir??"
I can't piss out of it", he replied.
The waiting room erupted in laughter.
Mess with seniors and you're gonna lose!
 
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