[Contest] Article: contest: uf against humanity

So a discussion came up over the weekend about Cards Against Humanity. If you're not familiar with the game, its similar to the game Apples to Apples, only much worse. If you're not familiar with Apples to Apples, just know that the game is a ton of fun and was born of the horrible things on the internet. It's a great game to play, especially if you're drunk.

The game comes with 550 cards. That's a lot of cards. But it isn't enough. It also comes with blank cards. This is where you guys come in. I want to fill up all of our blank cards with funny, odd, and/or horrible things. So let's do this. For people who have never played the game, here's a quick run down. Someone (called the Card Czar) reads a black card aloud. It will say something like this:

Why am I sticky?
And I would have gotten away with it too, if it hadn't been for ____________.
What brought the orgy to a grinding halt?

Now everyone else will lay their funniest white card (face down) on the table. The Card Czar will randomly pick them up and reward the black card to the person who he/she thought was the funniest. Simple right? Good. Now I want your ideas for white cards.

Rules:
  • Obviously it can't be a card that already exists. Don't be an ass.
  • Some light racism is okay, but nothing totally over the line like the N word or something.
  • The card should be something that's likely based on general knowledge.
  • If it would be funny, it could even be a single word.
  • Enter as many times as you want.
  • Contest continues until 11:59 EST Thursday night.
  • Winners will probably be announced on Friday.

Prizes:
It would probably be awesome if I could actually give the game away. However, its rarely in stock at Amazon. They have the option of printing out the PDF for free and having Kinkos print it on card stock, but I'm way too lazy for that. So here it goes:

  • Two grand prizes: Any party game on Amazon (up to $30). If you'd like to wait until CAH is actually in stock, I will do that and buy you the real game.
  • Two runners up prizes: Will receive the first and second expansion pack to the game.
 
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This is a very good point. I haven't memorized all the cards either. In fact, I probably haven't seen them all. So how will we know? Is there some searchable list?

There is a list if you want to look at the PDF that I linked to. It has all of them. Otherwise, just be creative. :)
 
Being bent over while an Indian punches his little brown worm into your dark depths while drinking Chivas and chain smoking.