Thread ...and don't call me Shirley

Oddly enough, Benny Hill sold in the US for about 100 years after we last found him funny ( his audience peaked in 1979 in the UK). His show is even being shown in Australia still.
 
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Just started watching Police Squad

SALLY: Well, when I first heard the shot, and, as I turned, Jim Fell.
HOCKEN: Uhh, he's the teller, Frank.
DREBIN: Jim Fell's the teller?
SALLY: No, Jim Johnson.
DREBIN: Who's Jim Fell?
HOCKEN: He's the auditor, Frank.
SALLY: He had the flu, so Jim filled in.
DREBIN: Phil who?
HOCKEN: Phil Din, he's the night watchman.
SALLY BEGINS CRYING
SALLY: If only Phil had been here!
DREBIN: Alright, now, wait a minute. Now, let me get this straight. Twice came and shot the teller and Jim Fell.
SALLY: No, he only shot the teller, Jim Johnson. Phil is ill.
DREBIN: Ok, then after he shot the teller, you shot Twice.
SALLY: No, I only shot once.
HOCKEN: Twice is the hold-up man.
SALLY: Then I guess I did shoot Twice.
DREBIN: Well, so now you're changing your story.
SALLY: No, I shot twice after Jim fell.
DREBIN: You shot Twice AND Jim Fell?
SALLY: No, Jim fell first and then I shot Twice once.
DREBIN: Well who fired twice?
SALLY: Once.
HOCKEN: He's the owner of the tire company, Frank.
DREBIN: Ok. Now Once is the owner of the tire company and he fired Twice. Then Twice shot the teller once.
SALLY: Twice.
DREBIN: And Jim fell and then you fired twice.
SALLY: Once.
DREBIN: Ok. Alright. That'll be all for now, Miss Decker.
HOCKEN: We'll need you to make a formal statement down at the station.
SALLY: Oh, of course.
DREBIN: You've been very helpful. We think we know how he did it.
SALLY: Oh, Howie couldn't have done it. He hasn't been in for Weeks.
DREBIN: Well, thank you again, Miss Decker.
DREBIN (to HOCKEN): Weeks?
HOCKEN: Sol Weeks. He's the comptroller, Frank.