Thread All new 2019 Super Duper Sperm thread!

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

being programmed to look at buttholes all day will definitely lead to a robot-rebellion at some point

 

[august]

This is the perfect application for machine learning - butthole classification for bidet aiming.

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

lol @ anusprint

 

[Jehannum]

View attachment 16398

I guess anything's a biometric if you're persistent enough.

 

[Hoff Kinkmeister]

Not when you get hit by lightning...

You seem to have missed that I was clowning on your "mass shootings nbd" takes.

 

[Mr. Argumentor]

Old toilet seat wore out... so upgraded to a bidet

Amazon product ASIN B00UCIOX2Q
It sure is something else. Pretty sure theres a tiny gnome in there with a laser sight targeting that thing at my butthole.

 

[fly]

like i said, gnome with a laser sight for this one. for pretty much whoever you are.

1) Theres an oscillate button
2) There a pulse button
3) There's a hot air dryer when you're done
4) You can adjust temperature, pressure, and position (x and y)
5) you can save presets.

I wasn't disagreeing, just mentioning that the non-electric targeting system is non-existent (but still amazing).

 

[fly]

You seem to have missed that I was clowning on your "mass shootings nbd" takes.

Not at all. Much like shootings, getting struck by lightning sucks. Thankfully both are extremely unlikely!

 

[Josh]

 

[Mean Mr. Mustard]

I like that Ass Hill is right down the road from Shitterton

 

[Mikeawesome]

looks like bed bath and beyond is the new gamestop. $5 to ~$28 in 2 weeks

 

[APRIL]

View attachment 16408

So are you saying England is a vagina?

 

[fly]

For the man who has everything...

Reusable Toilet Paper – 24 Piece Toilet UnPaper Roll | Net Zero Co.

This reusable toilet paper is 100% organic cotton & machine washable. Shop now for 100% plastic-free shipping. Happiness guaranteed & free delivery available. 1 order = 1 tree planted.

www.netzerocompany.com

 

[ZRH]

For the man who has everything...

Reusable Toilet Paper – 24 Piece Toilet UnPaper Roll | Net Zero Co.

This reusable toilet paper is 100% organic cotton & machine washable. Shop now for 100% plastic-free shipping. Happiness guaranteed & free delivery available. 1 order = 1 tree planted.

www.netzerocompany.com

Isn't that essentially a washcloth?

 

[Jehannum]

For the man who has everything...

Reusable Toilet Paper – 24 Piece Toilet UnPaper Roll | Net Zero Co.

This reusable toilet paper is 100% organic cotton & machine washable. Shop now for 100% plastic-free shipping. Happiness guaranteed & free delivery available. 1 order = 1 tree planted.

www.netzerocompany.com

Why not just use a bidet?

 

[Jehannum]

Isn't that essentially a washcloth?

it's a poo cloth.

 

[Mr. Argumentor]

Today was a pretty god damned shitty day.

Dreamed I saw Luna last night. She was playing about 5-10 feet away from me and wouldn't come to me when I called and I couldn't get to her.
Threw me off all day.

Fuck

 

[Petunia]

Today was a pretty god damned shitty day.

Dreamed I saw Luna last night. She was playing about 5-10 feet away from me and wouldn't come to me when I called and I couldn't get to her.
Threw me off all day.

Fuck

awwww i’m sorry babe

 

[ZRH]

Blog time:

Been pretty boring. Gas prices are getting better so that's a plus. Had to change insurance and the new insurance agent sent me a handwritten letter on lined paper. Get me customers and Ill give you giftcards. I respect a hustle. Went out with a girl I met months ago, she poofed and I figured she ghosted me and she showed up crying over some other dude so I got her a pizza and some beers. She wanted to cover the beers though so showed up at my work the next day before I was there and gave my manager $40. Then asked me if my manager was single. Also it takes some balls to be illegal and drive uninsured in a honda with 330k miles on it around Baltimore

Yeah that's about it.

 

[fly]

Why not just use a bidet?

Its for use with one.