Absolutely serious thread advice needed

DeathBatCountry

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Feb 26, 2009
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Ok....

So long story short.. My sister in law starts dating this guy a little over a year ago who was on house arrest. Well he tells her that it was because he punched his lawyer on a DUI charge. Well just a few months into their relationship he was thrown back in jail for violation of probation. Turns out he wasn't on house arrest but probation for a previous charge. And the violation was because he hit a woman charges were (offensive touching and menacing) he gets sentenced to two years in jail.

I thought two years was kind of harsh and everyone said the (black) judge was just being racist.

He controls my sister in law from jail, is verbally abusive. He yells at her for going out to dinner with her family. She can't even sit at dinner without him calling over and over until she answers. She is told to spend time with his son, she wears wedding rings and uses his last name even though they aren't married. She has no self esteem anymore, he has beaten her down so bad, all from jail. Recently my wife and I have learned he has threatened to kill her or have her killed.

So I had his criminal charges pulled..... It's not good....No he hasn't killed anyone.. But there are bad charges and a lot of them.

Now we don't know what to do. My mother in law is so naive that she refuses to see how this guy is ruining her daughters life. If we took this information to her I could see her blame us for snooping. Or is it putting my wife and I in danger when the information gets back to him.

I don't know what to do...
 
Pretty simple.

Someone fucks with the family, you fuck back.

$50 and 2 cartons of smokes is the going rate to get someone shanked in the pen.
 
From what we've heard his ass has already been kicked twice in jail.

Who said anything about having his ass kicked?

It's your sister. Since she's so beaten down she won't wise up. There really is only one other solution.

You might think I'm kidding. I'm not.
 
You have a responsibility for pointing out your findings. You have a responsibility for suggesting a course of action to those involved and periferal peanut galleries. I would suggest you recommend to the woman to press charges of harassment and endangerment. Since he is already in jail, the penalties for that are much more severe. Record these phone calls as well for evidence in the case.
 
If your sister can't step up even after seeing what's going on, cut your losses and move on. You have made your point and she won't act on it. No reason to drag you and your other family relationships down because of it.
 
Help rebuild her self esteem and help her see that there is a better life out there for her. Maybe even some therapy to help her get over the abuse. She has to get out of it before he gets out of jail.

I'm sorry. That's a tough situation.
 
And you don't have to report that YOU found this stuff out. It is, after all, her phone. It could just be made to look like SHE made the claims and provided the proof.
 
Breaking it off will make the dude want to kill her more once he gets out.


I'm with Duke. Have him shanked for a carton of fags.
 
Well her best friends have offered to move her down to Alabama with them to get her away from him.

She's currently unemployed, has no motivation to even find a job. There a lots of jobs and good guys down there the friends have told her. That's what we're trying to do now.
 
That's a very good option indeed. Yes, please push for her to get out of her current situation. At least for a little while.
 
Well she is so glued to his families ass it's insane. She spends more time with HIS family (while he's in jail) then she spends with her own.

The day she lost her job she spent 200.00 on toys for HIS son.
 
You cannot fix this. The only way this will turn out good is if she wants to change.

Go fishing in the meantime. Things always have a way of working themselves out.