5000M for someone to write the FAQ

thrawn said:
i wasnt sure exactly what the rules were going to be on that sort of thing, is why i didnt mention much. but i will add that in a moment. i'm gonna be leaving work here in a moment, so maybe an hour or so.

i guess the only thing i would like to know is if anyone else has something they would like to add. there is alot that could be included in a FAQ for this place. anyone?
could you please add that fly has my balls in a vice for producing funzie comics


that and I love sex






sex with --> :nev:
 
so thats where marklar came from, i always thought it was just a word that was fun to say

marklar

marklar....marklar marklar
 
JulianDelphiki said:
so thats where marklar came from, i always thought it was just a word that was fun to say

marklar

marklar....marklar marklar



episode 311, starvin marvin and the gang
 
Drool-Boy said:
mikey rocks

ps - be sure and put in there someplace that the 'nev smells like old cheese


i was trying to work the twinkie obsession in there somewhere but ran out of time
 
thrawn said:
1. What are the Useless Forums?
They are useless forums, were you expecting another response?

2. What are the Useless Forums?
No, really. They are useless forums. It is a place to get to know a few people from around the globe, ask questions, make fun of Drool-Boy and perhaps enjoy an exchange of witty banter. And oddly enough, it’s all done without your index finger getting sore from scrolling through the rants of 12,000 virginal children posting nonsense.

3. Do I have to register?
No, you do not. You must register to post and take advantage of all the amenities UselessForums have to offer. And Fly could use another email address to spam with his “I pleasure Boars” monthly.

4. I registered, now what?
So you decided that you wanted to check out Fly’s monthly. Our condolences. In any event, welcome to UselessForums. You will find that you have a title below your user name that reads, “Rated PG.” This means that you may post in the Proving Grounds only, for the time being. If you would ever like to leave Drool’s hellhole, you must post a welcome thread and introduce yourself. Please astound us with your humor and wit. After you introduce yourself and post a bit, there is a chance you may be released. Inane posting can also get you sent back to the PG, think before you post (Yeah, like this happens with great frequency…).

5. What do I need to know about posting?
If you start a thread with no meaningful content, odds are it will be locked. Posts that contain nothing of value make reading threads a drudgery. QFT, REPOST, OMGHI2U, FIRST POST and various other similar phrases do not contribute to a thread and make you appear foolish in the eyes of others. I mock your value system. Past instances in which I professed to like you were fraudulent. I engaged in intercourse with your spouse or significant other. You may use as many curse words as your limited vocabulary allows. There is a work-safe theme you may make use of if you do not want to read such profanity. Civility is appreciated. This is the Internet, you can be as anonymous as you wish. You may post on this forum regardless of race, sex, sexual orientation or creed without ridicule from other members. It is expected that you will return the courtesy. Outright racism, hostility and sexism will not be tolerated. There is a difference between jokes and blatant antagonism. Tre is a filthy, goat humping homo. Now I have known Tre for several years and he knows that that was a joke. Drool-Boy and Bungle are moving to Massachusetts to be wed, they enjoy long walks on the beach and mai tais with the frilly umbrellas. If I made a joke here about the baron, I will pay for it later, so I am going to refrain. See that, I am using the FAQ to joke with people I know. They know it is a joke, I know it is a joke. I even used some sapience and refrained from a comment that I would’ve regretted. The mods and/or admins will let you know if they feel a post crosses the line between joking and antagonism or hatred. Please work with them, they only wish to make for an enjoyable forum experience. Please, no nudity. If something is not safe for work, make it very clear.

6. What is the front page?
The front page, what you see when you go here, is basically where FatBurger hangs out. You really don’t want to know what that entails. Lets just say it has nothing to do with where he fraternizes. You will also find interesting articles, news, forum statistics and the latest Funzie’s cartoon.

7. What is The Adventures of Funzie?
This is a cartoon secreted from the squalid minds of Drool-Boy and Elpmis. It involves a lot of mayo and a drunken clown. How can it not be humorous? It may not be work-safe.

8. What is marklar?
Marklar is the monetary unit of UselessForums. Southpark aficionados will recognize the term from an episode involving an outcast group of people from North Africa. Marklar can refer to any noun, verb, adjective, pronoun, or word. Watch the episode for further explanation. Outside of UselessForums, marklar is useless. It is debatable as to whether it is useful on the forum. Marklar in the bank earns interest and is safe from thieving bastards.

9. How do I obtain marklar?
You earn marklar from posting. Another member may take pity on you and donate marklar. You may try your hand at robbery if you like and attempt to pillage another member’s marklar. Be warned, if you are not successful you will lose the amount you tried to burgle. You win marklar in the arcade with high scores. Please be gentle with the pengu.

10. What is the Store?
If you are fortunate enough to amass marklar, the Store is where you bank marklar or use marklar for marklar. You may purchase titles, customize your user name, attempt a heist of another member’s marklar, purchase an arcade pass and so on.

11. What is the arcade?
It’s where you play games goofball. After you have purchased an arcade pass, you will notice there are several games you may try your hand at. You win the marklar amount listed for a high score. Please refrain from beating the tetris high score, it distracts me at work. I have three starving children at home named Marvin; I need this job to afford their rice and unfiltered river water. Your arcade pass expires after thirty days and you must purchase another.

12. What are the green blobs below my user name when I post?
Someone sneezed on the server. Sorry about that. The green blobs indicate reputation. The more reputation you earn, the more green blobs you get. Some people have red blobs because they have been very naughty.

13. What are the thumbs up/thumbs down next to the reputation blobs?
You may use these to express approval or righteous indignation at a particular post. A thumbs up adds to the posters reputation and thumbs down subtracts from their reputation. The reputation system is not anonymous, so no stalker comments.

14. I want to post a picture; will someone host it for me?
UselessForums has an image uploader. Click on the upload button at the top of your screen and follow the instructions.

15. I like what I see here; can I invite a friend?
Yes, you may. You earn 100 marklar for referrals. Please, no more retards than we already have. Don’t make me kick you in your shin.



no one has anything else to add?
 
Drool-Boy said:
I dont like the frilly umbrellas dammit


youre more of a cute plastic olive sword guy, but we all know bungle wets himself when he sees a frilly umbrella