i just killed the biggest spider i've ever saw in my entire life, it was so big that it was finding it hard to climb up the wall before eventually falling to the ground. i was actually asleep, but i awoke suddenly. i suspect it's footfalls were audible.
seeing as it's almost 4.30am, and i have work in 4 hours i decided that this was completely unacceptable behaviour from a spider. i used my tweezers to remove this ones leg after his fall, this stopped him from running. i was then clean to take my time and bring him to the ashtray i keep for this very circumstance, once there i sprayed a liquid bodyspray into the lid of the can so that it condensed into a water-like liquid. after pouring onto our stricken friend i engulfed him in flame - long after the liquid had burned off he was still on fire. 3 minutes in all he burned for before i finally put it out. the stubs of his legs rising from the ashtray like the remnants of the world trade centre at ground zero.