Ontopic The "Should not have done that" thread V. Sexual Misdeeds

Immigrant said:
Predatory? Maybe. Depends on the circumstances.

Women sure got married younger 500 years ago. Was it deemed predatory then, or normal behavior?
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people also died at 40 500 years ago, and regularly killed eachother without consequence, and enslaved other human beings.

We are not that species anymore (or at least we're trying not to be)
 
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Immigrant said:
I’m not talking about the legal sense, never said that.

What Milo said was something about how young gay men look for older men to be with, it’s a normal thing, blah blah, and he was just saying how it is. And it is that way.

I’m not talking about a 40 year old hitting on a 12 year old. The guy I knew that was with an older boyfriend was 17.
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The legal definition is literally where the phrase "of age" comes from. Even ignoring that, you may not have meant to talk about the legal definition, but you didn't clarify at all how that type of relationship is ok (and still haven't.)

Who is Milo?
 
Immigrant said:
Predatory? Maybe. Depends on the circumstances.

Women sure got married younger 500 years ago. Was it deemed predatory then, or normal behavior?
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Well, we generally didn't have a choice. through the lens of back then would they deem it predatory? obviously not, but we also used to consider slavery acceptable, and as recently as ... today, there's a state in the US that views spousal rape as requiring a specific above-and-beyond level of force to be considered, you know, rape, (and as recently as 2003, about half of the states still had some sort of marital immunity re: rape in their laws).

just because people used to be ok with a thing doesn't mean the thing isn't fucked
 
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but also this entire digression regarding whether he is a pedo or not is irrelevant as one can be a creep or predator without being a pedo. my mentioning the victims age wasn't meant to point out or imply that Spacey is a pedophile or hebephile or whatever.

it is, however, a classic tool of sexual predators, regardless of the age associated with their paraphilia if an age -based paraphilia exists, to ply their victims with drinks; and it is a classic tool to select victims that are younger and more inexperienced, and that doesn't have to mean underage.
 
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august said:
but also this entire digression regarding whether he is a pedo or not is irrelevant as one can be a creep or predator without being a pedo. my mentioning the victims age wasn't meant to point out or imply that Spacey is a pedophile or hebephile or whatever.

it is, however, a classic tool of sexual predators, regardless of the age associated with their paraphilia if an age -based paraphilia exists, to ply their victims with drinks; and it is a classic tool to select victims that are younger and more inexperienced, and that doesn't have to mean underage.
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"Grooming"
 
I also want to mention that the internetting that was done/video/instagramming that keeps getting mentioned seems to be, and maybe I'm being generous here, misunderstood by some folks here. he wasn't blasting the video far and wide (like "look at me flirting w a star teehee, oops I regret it later"), he sent a Snapchat video of it to one person - his girlfriend.
 
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august said:
I also want to mention that the internetting that was done/video/instagramming that keeps getting mentioned seems to be, and maybe I'm being generous here, misunderstood by some folks here. he wasn't blasting the video far and wide (like "look at me flirting w a star teehee, oops I regret it later"), he sent a Snapchat video of it to one person - his girlfriend.
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That was in the article I read. I fully understand why he took a video and who he sent it too. I was pointing out that taking a video at that moment probably wouldn't have been the first thing I would think to do if this had happened to me.
Mostly because as I was growing up and learning life through my personal experiences, like how to react to certain situations, making video wouldn't have been an option. So it wouldn't be part of my life survival skill set that eventually becomes a learned reaction, again, depending on the situation and aggression of the other person.
 
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Mr. Asa said:
The legal definition is literally where the phrase "of age" comes from. Even ignoring that, you may not have meant to talk about the legal definition, but you didn't clarify at all how that type of relationship is ok (and still haven't.)

Who is Milo?
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I’m not the judge of what’s okay and what isn’t. I have no real opinion of a gay relationship between a 30 year old and a 17 year old, other than I wouldn’t be interested. The only point I tried to make is, out of the dozens of gay men I’ve known in my life, it wasn’t thought of as unusual to be in, or know of, a relationship with a vast age difference.

Maybe as I am now, I wouldn’t be interested, but I DID marry a 19 year old when I was 34.
 
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Oops. Milo.
I bet if I google “Milo”, he’ll be the first result.

He was a right wing gay dude popular amongst Breitbart-types.
 
august said:
Well, we generally didn't have a choice. through the lens of back then would they deem it predatory? obviously not, but we also used to consider slavery acceptable, and as recently as ... today, there's a state in the US that views spousal rape as requiring a specific above-and-beyond level of force to be considered, you know, rape, (and as recently as 2003, about half of the states still had some sort of marital immunity re: rape in their laws).

just because people used to be ok with a thing doesn't mean the thing isn't fucked
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I completely agree. I don’t think what happened to the accuser I was originally referencing is okay either. I just commented on his rather odd reaction to it and this place blew a gasket.
 
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Immigrant said:
It ain’t all it’s cracked up to be. As I’ve mentioned before, I knew it was doomed when I had to explain Led Zeppelin wasn’t a dude.
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By now you know there's pros and cons to absolutely everything. Most of us would have done a few things differently, but few of us know to enjoy what we've got when we've got it!!
 
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august said:
I also want to mention that the internetting that was done/video/instagramming that keeps getting mentioned seems to be, and maybe I'm being generous here, misunderstood by some folks here. he wasn't blasting the video far and wide (like "look at me flirting w a star teehee, oops I regret it later"), he sent a Snapchat video of it to one person - his girlfriend.
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From what I heard on the news, and on CNN, was that he also had a text conversation with his mom.

I’m a GD gimp and I could’ve got out of the booth and walked away in the time it took to post on Instagram, privately or not.
 
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Immigrant said:
I’m not the judge of what’s okay and what isn’t.
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Guy, by presenting your argument as a counter to what was being said, you were saying it was ok. You didn't explicitly state it, but by using it to back up your points you implicitly were saying ok.

As for Milo, fuck anything and everything that hate monger said. Even if it accurately reflects the world I guarantee someone worth a shit also said it.
 
So during our sexual assault, how long are we supposed to let the video run? Like as long as they want to keep doing it?
Enough to get evidence, then we can shank him, or what?

Enquiring minds want to know.
 
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