Screw this thread, its elpmis' birthday

[Dharma1521]

Do go blog about it, pussy.

[animepark13]

this makes one to many threads for that whore

[Sarcasmo]

Haha! It worked! There can never be too many threads for this whore!

[April40]

Wow.

How about for Sarcasmo's birthday we put him on global ignore.

[Sarcasmo]

Wow.

How about for Sarcasmo's birthday we put him on global ignore.

Your loss.

[April40]

Your loss.

Does anyone hear that?

[KNYTE]

This thread is now about paris hilton-related photo chops that I have created.

http://uselessforums.com/imagehosting/196467ff20b507ae.jpg
http://uselessforums.com/imagehosting/196467ff20b54df6.jpg
http://uselessforums.com/imagehosting/196467ff20b57125.jpg
http://uselessforums.com/imagehosting/196467ff20b5943e.jpg
http://uselessforums.com/imagehosting/196467ff2c1ae421.jpg

[JPatrick]

This thread sucks.

[ChikkenNoodul]

I was told there'd be camel eggs.

[Dharma1521]

I was told there'd be camel eggs.

You lie I promised nothing!

[w_a_w]

I was told there'd be camel eggs.

you misheard...that was camel spider eggs

[ChikkenNoodul]

Whatever, I've got the english muffin and cheese ready and I'm just waiting on some goddamn eggs.

[Onnotangu]

but there is goat milk avalible.



male goat milk.

[Sarcasmo]

Goat milk is very earthy, so male goat milk must taste like potting soil. This is the scientific hypothesis which I've just come up with.

[shawndavid]

Happy birthday, pimp.

[elpmis]

Happy Birthday homie :D

GO CANCERS!

[wanko80]

Hope the rest of your birthday was nice. Your sister is hot. Her husband is nice, but a little bit into himself. Your mom's tits are not as good as dbzeag's mom's.

How did you hot sister end up being the tallest person in your family?

[dbzeag]

Hope the rest of your birthday was nice. Your sister is hot. Her husband is nice, but a little bit into himself. Your mom's tits are not as good as dbzeag's mom's.

How did you hot sister end up being the tallest person in your family?

Wow, her tits must really suck then.

[fly]

Hope the rest of your birthday was nice. Your sister is hot. Her husband is nice, but a little bit into himself. Your mom's tits are not as good as dbzeag's mom's.

How did you hot sister end up being the tallest person in your family?

May I please have pics shithead?

[Sarcasmo]

Her husband is nice, but a little bit into himself.

bahaha

You'll get at least a 5-hour conversation about how much of a douchebag he is if you ask anyone in my family other than my sister. That dipshit will tell you point blank that he is the most intelligent person alive, yet he's an uneducated, materialistic inbred from Oklahoma with a crappy job. He's obsessed with buying shit. They moved into a house they couldn't afford so he could show it off. He talks about buying boats and expensive cars though he will always lack the income to do so and everyone knows it. He will make what he thinks are subtle and cunning comments about you and the things you own until you tell him very clearly to shut the fuck up (which I did) or threaten to beat the shit out of him (which my brother did).

He tries to give my dad these ridiculous, embarrassingly mundane pointers about being a corp. exec. (with regard to his new board of directors position), despite the fact that he's never done so and my dad's been doing it forever. He's convinced that college educations are useless since he managed to find a graphic designish type job without one. My sister wants a master's degree for teaching and in his opinion that's a foolish waste of money. And his son (my nephew) is turning into a spoiled, rude little shithead because he's being taught to fail at life. And my sister fails at parenting so she's no help. It's pretty painful hanging out with them for more than an hour sober.

[JPatrick]

How has he managed to go this long without getting all his teeth knocked out?

[April40]

Wow. That dude must have some deep deep deep rooted problems.

[Sarcasmo]

Wow. That dude must have some deep deep deep rooted problems.

He's from a mental and physical train wreck of a family. Everyone has some kind of disorder. Downs syndrome, kidney and glandular problems, alcoholism, diabetes, stupidity... you name it, you can find it somewhere. And THAT is what my sister decided to give her ovaries to.

He once told me he likes to lie to people because he enjoys playing mind games. Seriously. I didn't think it was bizarre, actually. I thought it was pathetic and sad. I just laughed and later discussed it with everyone in my family. What that meant was "I'm an idiot and everyone I meet knows it. Ironically lying makes me look even more stupid since it's completely transparent when it happens. But I don't realize that, though of course everyone else does. Once again the joke's on me. Have I ever engaged you in a conversation about real estate amortizations? Because I'm an authority on it."

[ERage]

I'll name my next child sized shit after you in honor of your birthday. Have a good one!

[fly]

I wish theac were here to lock this thread.

[April40]

He's from a mental and physical train wreck of a family. Everyone has some kind of disorder. Downs syndrome, kidney and glandular problems, alcoholism, diabetes, stupidity... you name it, you can find it somewhere. And THAT is what my sister decided to give her ovaries to.

He once told me he likes to lie to people because he enjoys playing mind games. Seriously. I didn't think it was bizarre, actually. I thought it was pathetic and sad. I just laughed and later discussed it with everyone in my family. What that meant was "I'm an idiot and everyone I meet knows it. Ironically lying makes me look even more stupid since it's completely transparent when it happens. But I don't realize that, though of course everyone else does. Once again the joke's on me. Have I ever engaged you in a conversation about real estate amortizations? Because I'm an authority on it."

:lol: :lol: I once had an ex like that. The lies should only work for so long, once you figure them out. Sucks for your sis, she probably realizes it and does not want to admit she has a habitual liar as a husband.

[fly]

:lol: :lol: I once had an ex like that. The lies should only work for so long, once you figure them out. Sucks for your sis, she probably realizes it and does not want to admit she has a habitual liar as a husband.

So you're dumping me? And I find out on a forum? FUCKING GENMAY

[ERage]

:lol: :lol: I once had an ex like that. The lies should only work for so long, once you figure them out. Sucks for your sis, she probably realizes it and does not want to admit she has a habitual liar as a husband.

my first roommate in college was that way. Even when we were around the age of 8 or 9 he used to lie. I didn't think it odd then, you know how kids are, but at age 18-20 yeah...

He used to tell us Michael Jackson was his cousin and that they would have parties together (circa 1988). If he only knew then what everyone knows now.

[w_a_w]

:lol: :lol: I once had an ex like that. The lies should only work for so long, once you figure them out. Sucks for your sis, she probably realizes it and does not want to admit she has a habitual liar as a husband.

I don't see how you could make that mistake unless they got married after knowing each other for 2 weeks or something crazy like that

[ERage]

I don't see how you could make that mistake unless they got married after knowing each other for 2 weeks or something crazy like that

Shotgun wedding?

[wanko80]

And my sister fails at parenting so she's no help.
Yeah, but she's hot.

I really didn't want to just come out and say he was a douche if you like him, but man he's pretty bad. If all that is true, then my favorite part of the night was when he thought he would casually drop how much their house cost so he could make fun of people who had bought houses they couldn't afford. That was the second or third time I'd heard him try to work in how much he made, and I can only gather he was trying to be subtle about it.

I suppose I could have pulled out my W2 and dickwhipped him, but I just let it slide. See how I just casually let drop how much money I make. It makes me feel so good and so hard. Fuck I'm awesome.

Also, I was talking to him about exercising, which apparently he's a fucking Kenyan with all the miles he runs, and he was talking about running and swimming, then he stops and turns to Chris and says "I do triathlons" as though Chris would stop him right there and start to blow him. It was so fucking absurd I had to stop the conversation after he was done.

[fly]

Yeah, but she's hot.

I really didn't want to just come out and say he was a douche if you like him, but man he's pretty bad. If all that is true, then my favorite part of the night was when he thought he would casually drop how much their house cost so he could make fun of people who had bought houses they couldn't afford. That was the second or third time I'd heard him try to work in how much he made, and I can only gather he was trying to be subtle about it.

I suppose I could have pulled out my W2 and dickwhipped him, but I just let it slide. See how I just casually let drop how much money I make. It makes me feel so good and so hard. Fuck I'm awesome.

Also, I was talking to him about exercising, which apparently he's a fucking Kenyan with all the miles he runs, and he was talking about running and swimming, then he stops and turns to Chris and says "I do triathlons" as though Chris would stop him right there and start to blow him. It was so fucking absurd I had to stop the conversation after he was done.

You have to be one of the biggest dicks I know. Fuck you make me rock hard.

[Onnotangu]

Pics of sister....for science and possible saving from asshole.

[wanko80]

You have to be one of the biggest dicks I know. Fuck you make me rock hard.
I've tried using a rock before, and it chafed a little more than I thought was pleasant. Please be less hard if you want in these pants.

[Sarcasmo]

Yeah, but she's hot.

I really didn't want to just come out and say he was a douche if you like him, but man he's pretty bad. If all that is true, then my favorite part of the night was when he thought he would casually drop how much their house cost so he could make fun of people who had bought houses they couldn't afford. That was the second or third time I'd heard him try to work in how much he made, and I can only gather he was trying to be subtle about it.

I suppose I could have pulled out my W2 and dickwhipped him, but I just let it slide. See how I just casually let drop how much money I make. It makes me feel so good and so hard. Fuck I'm awesome.

Also, I was talking to him about exercising, which apparently he's a fucking Kenyan with all the miles he runs, and he was talking about running and swimming, then he stops and turns to Chris and says "I do triathlons" as though Chris would stop him right there and start to blow him. It was so fucking absurd I had to stop the conversation after he was done.

Yeah. He's a triathlete. Uh huh. Jesus H. Christ.

[wanko80]

I don't think Jesus was known for his swimming or cycling skills. He was more of a one trick pony.

[w_a_w]

I don't think Jesus was known for his swimming or cycling skills. He was more of a one trick pony.

if you can walk on water than you can certainly run as well...fastest swimmer evar!
I'm sure he could divine the pedals to spin too

[wanko80]

But that's not swimming. That's just running on water.

[kiwi]

I have nothing clever to say to make fun of you, so I'll just stick with Happy Birthday Sarcasmo!

[April40]

I want to meet this guy... he sounds like someone I could lie with.


Ba dum bum.

[Thorn Bird]

:crap: there. happy birthday.

[dbzeag]

Very nice title rape.

[April40]

Yeah, screw that Sacasmo dude. All he does is piss on everyones parade.

[Thorn Bird]

wait, who's thread is this? :confused:

[fly]

No ones