homemade fleshlight

[w_a_w]

this is a fucking riot :lol:

Taken from mustangforums.com


http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_01.jpg

Materials
Lays Stacks (my preferance, holds up better)/Pringles potato chip can
Foam rubber
Condom
1 1/4'' o-ring
Scissors
Marker
Procedure
Empty the chips out of the can. You can use whatever brand and flavor you prefer, but we like the one shown here for the container’s ergonomic shape and durable, colorful plastic. Lay out the foam and trim to fit the length of the container if necessary. The length of the foam can be up to a half inch longer than the length of the can.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_03.jpg

Unroll the condom and drop the O-ring inside. If you use a lubricated condom, turn it inside out first, so the lube is on the inner surface.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_04.jpg

Lay the condom along the foam with the open end slightly above the edge, and mark across where the O-ring lays in the condom. Cut the foam into two pieces along this line.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_05.jpg

Roll up the smaller piece of foam and push it into the bottom of the can. Lay the condom against the shorter edge of the other piece of foam so that the tip and the O-ring are hanging over one end and the open top of the condom is hanging over the other. Roll up the foam with the condom inside. The O-ring should be flat against one end of the foam roll, and the top of the condom should be sticking out of the center of the other end.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_06.jpg

With the scissors, make a nick in the tip of the condom, just enough so some air can get through. Insert the foam roll into the chip container, making sure the open end of the condom stays above the top of the foam. Leave about ½” of foam above the rim of the can.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_07.jpg

Use a nail or screwdriver to poke a small hole on the side of the can near the bottom.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_hole.jpg

Optional: If desired, use a pink or red marker to draw a vagina or lips on the foam around the center hole before covering the foam with the condom.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_09.jpg

Carefully stretch the condom around the rim of the can and over the lip so it covers the foam. The lip of the can will hold the condom in place.

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/chips_08.jpg

To use your homemade flashlight toy, squirt some water-based, non-greasy lube into the condom and insert your penis. Cover the hole in the can with the tip of your finger to control the amount of “suction” you get. Closing the hole will increase the suction, so leave it open as you stroke in, and cover it on the out stroke.

Remove the foam roll and replace the condom after use (or rinse and reuse, if you’re really cheap, I know I am. :dodgy. Use a textured condom turned inside out for more stimulation. Because the condom has a small opening on the end, the foam at the bottom of the can will periodically need to be replaced.
Lays:

http://www.homemade-sex-toys.com/flashlight/img/mouth.jpg

[FlamingGlory]

...

[Ryokurin]

Thats a pretty loose condom if you can get in and out of one with ease. I know I can't.

[JPatrick]

Thats a lot of trouble to go to just to jerk off

[BeerAd]

Thats a pretty loose condom if you can get in and out of one with ease. I know I can't.

Wait, but your black though right?

Somebody get this man a magnum

[Ryokurin]

so wait its supposed to be somewhat loose?

[w_a_w]

Thats a pretty loose condom if you can get in and out of one with ease. I know I can't.

very good point

[wanko80]

Thats a pretty loose condom if you can get in and out of one with ease. I know I can't.
I thought you were a virgin. Do you just practice wearing them? More than once?

[animepark13]

that is ridiculous :bowrofl:
"Optional: If desired, use a pink or red marker to draw a vagina or lips on the foam around the center hole before covering the foam with the condom."
:fly: it ends up looking like a raw ass hole

[JPatrick]

I thought you were a virgin. Do you just practice wearing them? More than once?



I wear them all the time. Its the easy way to make pee-filled balloons.

[BeerAd]

Why would anyone want to use a condom? I dont even like using them when I have to.

[animepark13]

how can anyone take them seriously when they look down and see they are fucking a chip can.

[Ryokurin]

I thought you were a virgin. Do you just practice wearing them? More than once?

was. What was I supposed to announce I wasn't anymore? anyhow, it dosn't hurt to practice

[JPatrick]

was. What was I supposed to announce I wasn't anymore? anyhow, it dosn't hurt to practice



Yeah, I thought you were gonna hire a sky-writer to announce it:confused:

[Ryokurin]

it wasn't that great and its not really a big deal anyways

[ChikkenNoodul]

"Because the condom has a small opening on the end, the foam at the bottom of the can will periodically need to be replaced."

That's revolting :mryuck:

[w_a_w]

how can anyone take them seriously when they look down and see they are fucking a chip can.

sexing an actual fleshlight is somehow more fulfilling? :p

[animepark13]

sexing an actual fleshlight is somehow more fulfilling? :p

i would think so compared to shoving your cock into something that you were eating out of earlier. the guy left the wrapper on the can like it was a way of hidding it..... what if someone saw it and really had an urge for some chips so they opened it only to be greatly disapointed

[JPatrick]

i would think so compared to shoving your c*ck into something that you were eating out of earlier. the guy left the wrapper on the can like it was a way of hidding it..... what if someone saw it and really had an urge for some chips so they opened it only to be greatly disapointed

Youre supposed to wrap it with a picutre of Bea Arthur.

[w_a_w]

Youre supposed to wrap it with a picutre of Bea Arthur.

now THAT would get mr. mojo risin'

[Jonny_B]

...shoving your cock into something that you were eating out of earlier...
that's not unusual

[w_a_w]

that's not unusual

:lol: well done, sir :D

[animepark13]

that's not unusual
eating out and eating out of is differnet.... unless you like to shove cheetos in men's asses and dig in

[ChikkenNoodul]

eating out and eating out of is differnet.... unless you like to shove cheetos in men's asses and dig in

Does it have to be cheetos? Some corned beef hash or egg salad perhaps?

[animepark13]

Does it have to be cheetos? Some corned beef hash or egg salad perhaps?

its all up to your culinary preference, you could have a stew for all i care.

[Jonny_B]

its all up to your culinary preference, you could have a stew for all i care.
hot foods are best avoided... don't ask.

[BeerAd]

I usually shoot for drools poo poo platter.

[animepark13]

hot foods are best avoided... don't ask.

so you know from experience? :fly:
i don't know how great ice cream would turn out....

[dbzeag]

w_a_w, your sexual obsession is disturbing. Especially if you consider your elevated age. I mean, you are teetering precariously close to "scary old man" with your antics.

:heart:

[bast_imret]

Was this featured in an issue of MAKE?

[w_a_w]

w_a_w, your sexual obsession is disturbing. Especially if you consider your elevated age. I mean, you are teetering precariously close to "scary old man" with your antics.

:heart:

:lol:

[hawk82]

Was this featured in an issue of MAKE?

:lol:

[Onnotangu]

w_a_w, your sexual obsession is disturbing. Especially if you consider your elevated age. I mean, you are teetering precariously close to "scary old man" with your antics.

:heart:

dear pot


you might be of a solid dark color.

love,
Kettle

[w_a_w]

dear pot


you might be of a solid dark color.

love,
Kettle

I know, right? I think he's only a couple years younger than me, too! damned prude! :lol:

I guess once you reach 30 you are supposed to become asexual or something. I don't quite get it.

[Arátoeldar]

You wonder why you have problems attracting a lady instead of a flooze. :rolleyes:

[w_a_w]

You wonder why you have problems attracting a lady instead of a flooze. :rolleyes:

stfu miss greater than thou...I like you but you seriously condescend quite often and it makes you look like a giant fuckhead...just my .02 on you since you have no problem judging others

edit: and wtf is this coming from anyway? I post a funny thread about a homemade fleshlight which has nothing to do with ME PERSONALLY and all of a sudden I'm the devil or something? :rolleyes:

[JPatrick]

w_a_w gave my gramma cancer and kicked my kitten!
He is the debbil!

[Dharma1521]

w_a_w gave my gramma cancer and kicked my kitten!
He is the debbil!

I heard he clubs baby seals and drowns kittens.

[SemperFly]

Taken from mustangforums.com

that's my favorite part

lol ford drivers

[bast_imret]

W_A_W killed my mother and raped my father.

[Dharma1521]

W_A_W killed my mother and raped my father.

W_A_W is my father.

[w_a_w]

:lol:

[bast_imret]

W_A_W touched me in my bathing suit area.

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w hands out holey condoms at college parties

[JPatrick]

w_a_w gave my dog aids! The hard way:hi2u:

[bast_imret]

w_a_w gave my dog aids! The hard way:hi2u:

Through his pee hole?

[w_a_w]

Through his pee hole?

nostril

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w gave my dog aids! The hard way:hi2u:

He flew it to Africa, and dressed it up as a gorilla?

[bast_imret]

w_a_w sometimes asks what instead of why, and then when you are all confused, tells you he's just fucking with you, and punches you in the arm.

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w sold 'nev to Bolivian slave traders

[Dharma1521]

w_a_w sold me black ants for 1100 yen.

[wanko80]

w_a_w can out roundhouse kick Chuck Norris.

[dbzeag]

I want w_a_w's manbabies. This is no lie.

:heart:

[JPatrick]

w_a_w turned me into a newt!

[bast_imret]

w_a_w killed a man in reno, just to watch him die.

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w is the leader of the trilateral commission

[Dharma1521]

w_a_w killed a man in reno, just to watch him die.

HAHAHAH

[JPatrick]

w_a_w is the founding member of the Axis of Evil.

[bast_imret]

w_a_w wanted to be an astronaut when he was a little boy, and he used to play with his toy spaceship all day long, till one day his mother told him that he would never become an astronaut, becuase he was a mistake, and if it wasn't for him daddy would have never left to be with that slut, and that he ruined mommy's life, so instead he grew up and works for CNN.

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w created Asian bird flu

[bast_imret]

w_a_w insists on giving the shocker on a first date.

[bast_imret]

w_a_w can hit a ping pong ball so quickly and with such intense lateral spin that it will bore straight up your dickhole and kink your Vas Deferens, sterilizing you instantly.

[dbzeag]

w_a_w makes little dbzeag come outside and play. this is no shens

[Dharma1521]

w_a_w makes little dbzeag come outside and play. this is no shens

Ok I'm going to need to see a pic of w_a_w. Stat.

[wanko80]

w_a_w is the internet persona of my penis.

[animepark13]

w_a_w touched me in my dreams last night... and i liked it

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w sneaks into nursing homes and staples rubber gloves to old ladies' behinds.

[bast_imret]

w_a_w once queefed so hard that a tsunami suddenly rose off the coast of china and raped a cow.

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w stuffs carrots in his ass and puts them back in the produce section at Kroger's

[animepark13]

w_a_w pumps fresh O2 in his ass to increase the euphroic feeling for his partner.

[April40]

w_a_w sold me black ants for 1100 yen.

BWAHAHAHAHAHHAA

[April40]

W_A_W told me he loves bubbles.

[dbzeag]

W_A_W told me he loves bubble baths.

fixd

[April40]

fixd

With you?

[JPatrick]

w_a_w farted directly into the Popes mouth.

[April40]

w_a_w eated my cookie

[ChikkenNoodul]

w_a_w grills manatee steaks on his yacht

[JPatrick]

w_a_w turned me into a newt!



I got better, btw.

[animepark13]

w_a_w takes it from jack baurer on his off time



I got better, btw.

nice

[April40]

w_a_w grills manatee steaks on his yacht

:lol:

[April40]

w_a_w takes it from jack baurer on his off time

:lol: :lol:

[animepark13]

:lol: :lol:

i just watched s05ep14, got a little jack running in me

[April40]

i just watched s05ep14, got a little jack running in me

You shouldn't tell your sister such things.

[w_a_w]

:fly:

[dbzeag]

With you?

:shifty:

[bast_imret]

w_a_w fingered Justin Timberlake's butthole in 2003 and hasn't washed his hand since.

[w_a_w]

w_a_w fingered Justin Timberlake's butthole in 2003 and hasn't washed his hand since.

I used that finger to stir your drink at theacs a few months ago

[bast_imret]

I thought that drink tasted kinda shitty.

[Jonny_B]

Did I ever tell you about the time w_a_w took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally w_a_w takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us. The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. w_a_w yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found em!'

[April40]

Did I ever tell you about the time w_a_w took me out to go get a drink with him? We go off looking for a bar and we can't find one. Finally w_a_w takes me to a vacant lot and says, 'Here we are.' We sat there for a year and a half and sure enough someone constructs a bar around us. The day they opened we ordered a shot, drank it, and then burned the place to the ground. w_a_w yelled over the roar of the flames, 'Always leave things the way you found em!'

:lol: :lol: